Toys, books & games protect kids.

The Last Post. Moving to Child Protection: Serious Business.

2007-02-05T10:40:00.000+10:00

Following much discussion, Jade and I have decided to not post to this blog site any longer. My main blog, Child Protection: Serious Business appears to be the site of greatest traffic. Therefore, I will post about toys, books and games that can help protect kids to that site.

This blog will not be removed though because it already contains invaluable protective information and links to other helpful articles and sites.

We do hope that you will come and join us on Child Protection: Serious Business, or consider becoming a volunteer writer for our new protective behaviour concept - the largest child safety conversation in the world.

All the best. Stay safe and keep protecting your kids.

Megan Bayliss and Jade Pinto

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: Complete

2007-01-30T08:26:00.000+10:00

The entire book, Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast has now been posted, chapter by chapter. I do hope that you enjoyed it and I would love to hear some feedback. Just so that the contents are all on a single page, indexed links appear below the front cover picture.

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

A Dream Introduction

Bit 1. Tart Marmalade or Sweet Caramel
Bit 2. Caramel-Brown Toilet Sausages and Poisoned Worm Jelly
Bit 3. Leaping Tasmanian Devil in Sour Lime Sauce
Bit 4. Catmando and Reef Knots.
Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!
Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.
Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.
Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah
Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

A Dream Introduction

2007-01-29T07:01:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

A Dream Introduction

(By Jane Teresa Anderson, Dream analyst)

You are about to enter the world of Bitssy, a half-dingo pet dog, living a dream life of tropical delight in her Cairns backyard. She revels in long sunshiny days, playing with her animal friends amidst the colours, fragrances, textures and tastes of her tree-filled, fruit-laden, flower-blossoming heaven.

But all is not as it seems and this story is not all sweetness and light, for there’s a nightmare of a shadow in Bitssy’s life and it’s close to home, right in her front yard, making her too scared to sit on her own front verandah. Caramel, the dog from across the road who likes to sit in Bitssy’s front yard, may have a sweet name and a crafty way of appearing to be good to everyone else, but Caramel is really a manipulating bully.

Will Bitssy spend her life confined to her backyard or will she find the magic formula to rid her life of Caramel’s influence and turn her living nightmare into a living happy dream?

Every problem has a solution, but it can be very hard to see that solution when you are afraid. Fortunately for Bitssy, she meets Marmalade, a very cheeky, funny and courageous tomcat who has learned many wise lessons during eight of his nine lives.

Marmalade’s lessons are not all sweet either. Like all wise beings, he knows you need to face the bowels of life in order to deal with it and find solutions, so watch out for plenty of toilet humour delivered with meaning and love!

Animal stories such as this one are powerful. Do you ever have night dreams of animals? Do you wonder what they mean and how you can learn from them? Bitssy dreams of a wolverine who helps her find a special, deep, long-lost power. What is it? Do you have it deep within you, I wonder? Can you use it?

Here’s an insight: this book is written for middle readers aged 8-12, but no matter what age you are, child, young adult or grandparent, this story has a message for you. Like all good fairy stories, this one has the good, the bad and the ugly as well as the wise solution. Also, like all good fairy stories, this one will seem different each time you read it. Depending on your life experiences, you’ll identify with different parts of this story, and, as you grow older you’ll begin to see lots of clever word-play, puns, metaphors and allegories that will deliver you deeper and deeper wisdom about why abuse happens and what you can do to stop it.

This book was written to help educate people about sexual abuse, but it delivers an equally strong message about emotional abuse. Emotional abuse happens when someone hurts you, not in a physical way, but with words and actions that cut so deeply into your heart that they affect the way you express yourself in the world.

You’ll come out of this book with some powerful solutions for dealing with the shadows in your front yard, whatever those shadows might be.

So, what’s next?

It’s now time for you to forget everything you’ve just read. Yawn, stretch, find a comfy, quiet space and begin at the beginning, for that is how this story was designed and that’s where Bitssy is waiting for you to join her right now.

Jane Teresa Anderson (BSc Hons)
Dream analyst, author, broadcaster and scientist

Dream Network

Bit 1. Tart Marmalade or Sweet Caramel

Bit 2. Caramel-Brown Toilet Sausages and Poisoned Worm Jelly

Bit 3. Leaping Tasmanian Devil in Sour Lime Sauce

Bit 4. Catmando and Reef Knots.

Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!

Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.

Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.

Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah

Bit 9. Snot Nice

Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.

Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.

Bit 12. A Dog's Body

Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.

Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 1. Tart Marmalade or Sweet Caramel

2007-01-28T07:24:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 1, Tart marmalade or sweet caramel?

"I think I love you, so what am I so afraid of," sang Bitssy to herself while her developing dingo senses sniffed out a sleepy gecko, hiding from the sunlight in the screen door runners.

Bitssy's big person watched with curiosity and humour, seemingly reading Bitssy's mind.

"Hey Bitssy, I think you've been watching too many television commercials, you little dreamer you. It’s time for some outside play for you girl dog. You need a bit of body exercise."

The big person slid the screen open, disturbing the gecko from its safety zone. Gecko and Bitssy both tried for first place in the short sprint to the bromeliads growing outside the back door. Gecko won and Bitssy happily moved on to sniffing out a big green frog to play with. Luckily for the sun sensitive hibernating frog, a magnificent Mountain Blue butterfly fluttered by. Bitssy's concentration refocused to chasing the impossible dream, a dream of a butterdog flying above the fences, roofs and trees in suburban Cairns, checking that all was well with the land and her many friends.

Bitssy loved everyone and was mostly always content. She especially loved playing in her big, open back yard. The colossal trees provided shade and springy little garden animals to amuse her. She was happy, safe, and secure in her back yard, shaded by harmony. She had friends to talk to through the fence, and a number of special sleeping places.

On blistering hot days Bitssy would crawl under the low set old Queenslander that her big person was renting. She would dig a ginormous hole to get right down into the cool, damp soil. Burrowed into the sludge, she imagined it was really a soft, chocolate brown velvet doona on the big soft bed in the air-conditioned bedroom.

Bitssy had such a curious way of thinking. During her resting times, Bitssy would think deeply about all sorts of different things. Perhaps that’s why she dug deep holes under the house: it helped her to think, deeply. There was only one thing that Bitssy was not keen to think about though, and that was the Caramel monster!

As much as Bitssy wanted to frolic and explore in her equally dappled and deliciously tropical looking front yard, she remained scared of what Caramel would do. Caramel was the opposite of a gorgeous, free, butterdog: she was a fat poison toad! Bitssy found it easier to stay hidden inside the front screen door and enjoy the smells and activities from the front garden and street. From afar, the fine-looking children walking past, talking happily to each other, would have Bitssy beside herself with glee and anticipation. She so wanted to run out there and greet the children...but where was Caramel? What would Caramel do? Caramel might hurt the children too!

Bitssy knew she had courage, but when she saw Caramel her nerve would retreat like a gecko from the sunlight. Despite this run-away bravery, it was Bitssy who first bravely organised the neighbourhood dogs into the Dog’s Body Army. Bitssy won a special award for it when she was living in Brisbane. She was only a puppy, straight from her wide-open homeland of isolated Far North Queensland. Everywhere her big person had moved to since, the beautiful private stripe took pride of place in her big person’s antique glass china cabinet. It was a trophy of victory. Her big person proudly showed it off to everyone who came to visit. The guests would scratch Bitssy behind her ears, tickle her spotty tummy, and tell her how fantastically special she was. Best of all, the visitors raved about her unusual name. They loved it.

Bitssy daydreamed of her mother. Her mother specially chose Bitssy’s name straight after the birth behind the bits shed on the outback cattle station on remote Cape York Peninsula. Bitssy looked different to her brothers and sisters in the litter. She was bits of them all put together, plus a few other bits that her mother would rather she didn’t have. Bitssy's mother loved her intensely because she looked so very special. She lovingly licked Bitssy’s face and said,

"You are the most gorgeous creature I have ever seen. You are all bits of this and bits of that. Let's call you Bitssy, to celebrate your specialness. You will go a long way in life my little pup. Far away from here."

The dingoes, hiding in the bush, howled in celebration of Bitssy’s birth. To honour her naming ceremony, they dropped bits of dead animal outside the shed door. Nuzzling Bitssy closer to her, the tired cattle dog mother vowed that she would protect her young against the brutal killing forces that prowled the Australian bush. Those same forces had killed her mate and robbed her new litter of their father.

“You will not have my baby,” she promised. “My baby is going to the city. She is special!”

When Bitssy went to the city to live with her big person, the human could not work out what to call the little bitsa. Her big person decided,

"You're a bit of dingo and a big of cattle dog, a gorgeous strong creature with handsome bits of tapestry woven into a yellow red coat. I know, I'll call you Bitssy!”

So Bitssy stayed as Bitssy, known and loved by all her family and friends, both animals and big people. But she did feel a little alone sometimes, out of place, and as scared as a lost kitten. She was scared that Caramel would attack and kill her if Bitssy went out into her own front yard.

"Ohhhh," thought Bitssy, "maybe I've got a bit of cat in me too - scaredy cat."

Bit 2. Caramel-Brown Toilet Sausages and Poisoned Worm Jelly
Bit 3. Leaping Tasmanian Devil in Sour Lime Sauce
Bit 4. Catmando and Reef Knots.
Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!
Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.
Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.
Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah
Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 2. Caramel-Brown Toilet Sausages and Poisoned Worm Jelly

2007-01-26T08:05:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 2, Caramel-brown toilet sausages and poisoned worm jelly.

Caramel was the large, dirty yellow, pretty looking dog from across the road. She was allowed to roam around Jensen Street because her owners didn’t care much. Caramel liked to rest in the shaded dirt areas under gigantic trees. The dogcatcher had never caught her because the caramel dog was streetwise and never wandered far from home. From her vantage point in Bitssy's front yard she could see the dogcatcher driving up the road. When Caramel saw the smoke blowing van, she meandered, elegantly and controlled, back across the road and onto her own filthy front verandah. No love grew there, just a blowfly nursery for maggots that would keep Caramel company.

The dogcatcher was not allowed by law to enter Caramel’s yard to imprison her. His dream was to sneak up on her in the street, catch her, and reef her into the dog paddy wagon to be carted away. The poor old dogcatcher was very tired of receiving Jensen St calls about Caramel raiding rubbish bins and leaving foul, worm ridden, brown toilet sausages on residents’ front steps. There was nothing he could do unless somebody told him that Caramel was beginning to threaten and savage someone.

When Bitssy's big person came home from work, Bitssy was allowed to play and sleep in the house. Bitssy loved to run to the front screen door to watch and smell the world out front. Far too often, Caramel was asleep on Bitssy's front porch. If Bitssy woke Caramel, the yellow ogre became bad-tempered and roared at Bitssy, telling her she was nothing but a skinny, ugly, stupid, useless, pampered little pussy that would be crushed and ground and sold as Catnip tea.

“But I’m a dog. A proud, sturdy, independent dingo,” sobbed Bitssy to herself, her head hanging, not game to say anything in front of the very pretty monster.

Poor sad confused little Bitssy. Caramel’s wounding words turned her knees to jelly and slashed her insides like a blunt, poison soaked knife being hacked into her guts. Her heart felt tight, heavily chained up with rusty, barbed wire. Her voice, usually happy and confident, was silenced. She felt like the bulls in Spanish bullfights that had their vocal cords cut so that nobody could hear their bellows of pain when the Matadors stabbed blades into their shoulders. The monstrous hurts and putdowns pained so much that Bitssy was just not strong enough to tell Caramel to stop her bullying. Caramel, sensing that Bitssy was worn down and dying inside, delighted in terrorising Bitssy even more, hounding her and saying that if she ever stepped a foot in the front yard, she would be eaten, alive, at least until she died a painful death. As an added threat, if Bitssy chose to not die quickly and quietly, Caramel promised that she would turn on the big person, rip her to pieces and share her soft, white meat, with the rats! Then, like a gentle little flower, Caramel would bat her eyelids, yawn widely, close her eyes and lick her lips. Bitssy got the message, even though the difference between serial killer and pretty little flower didn’t make any sense. How could such a sweet little thing, as Caramel often pretended to be, also be a mass murderer? Surely killers had a certain bad, black look? Not fully understanding but still knowing that Caramel was very bad, Bitssy preferred to play it safe and stay away, off the front verandah.

Bit 3. Leaping Tasmanian Devil in Sour Lime Sauce
Bit 4. Catmando and Reef Knots.
Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!
Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.
Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.
Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah
Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 3. Leaping Tasmanian Devil in Sour Lime Sauce

2007-01-25T07:20:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 3, Leaping Tasmanian devil in sour lime sauce.

On this particular storm brewing, gecko chasing, frog hiding, flutterbyings buttering Bitssy up, backyard Sunday afternoon, Bitssy caught a glimpse of a marmalade cat. The orange feline was creeping secretly like a Tasmanian devil through the chunky flame coloured Heliconias growing along the side fence.

Bitssy was rather excited, her tail circling faster than the inside ceiling fan on high. Her tongue was dripping with the expectancy of making a new friend. Cheerfully, she watched the disguised Tasmanian devil for a minute until the breeze encouraged the long leaves to flitter, dance, and block the view of the Marmalade beauty. Bitssy blissfully pounded over to the marmalade spot. No Marmalade cat!

"Oh dear," grumbled Bitssy, her bottom lip almost scooping up the leaf litter, "I must have been butterfly dreaming."

Suddenly, with a meowing laugh, the huge, portly, sleepy eyed Marmalade cat appeared from behind a swaying jungle leaf.

"Hello dog," flicked Marmalade cheekily. "I don't like it when somebody is watching me go to the toilet so I hid from your prying little doggy eyes. Toileting is my business if you don't mind. No checking out my private regions thank you."

Bitssy blushed and coyly rubbed her ears with her paw.

"Sorry, excuse me, very sorry Marmalade. I didn't know you were toileting."

Marmalade obviously wasn't too embarrassed as he turned his back to Bitssy, stretched out his front legs, chest greeting the mulch, and reached his loin and tail high up toward the gathering
thunderclouds.

Marmalade's bare crinkled cat's bottom was right in Bitssy's face. Bitssy was suitably embarrassed and plopped to the ground with both paws covering her eyes. Impish, vulgar, Marmalade! Showing private parts to others is just not on. Marmalade had already chided Bitssy about privacy for goodness sake! When Bitssy was game enough to sneak a look, Marmalade was gone. Again!

"How does he do that?" thought Bitssy, sniffing up the tantalising scent of citrus marmalade with her wiggling, wet, fine, superior dingo smelling tool.

"He's over there somewhere. Oh no, he's gone over the side fence, through the lime tree, into the front yard!”

Bitssy stood, one bent front leg suspended in mid air, ears pricked and forward, hairs on her spine standing up like she’d just stuck her toenail in a power point.

"Where's Caramel?" she nervously whispered to herself, or to any other garden friend who chose to hang around for the showdown and gangland killing.

Breaking the heavily depressing calm, Bitssy heard a few loud fast barks, a guttural growling, a spat, a noise like children make when they put stones in a soft drink bottle and roll it around, another bark, growl, tearing flesh, a scream like a dying cat, and then.... silence.

Standing in hope, eyes glued to the spot where Marmalade had made her exit to certain death, Bitssy began to feel very sad. Not even a visitor could enter the front yard.

“Poor Marmalade,” Bitssy thought wretchedly.

“Poor, poor Marmalade. He looked like a nice cat. If only I’d had the chance to warn him how scary and mean Caramel is. It’s my fault. I should have done something. I should have stopped him.”

Bitssy sat, head hanging, and bottom lip definitely now collecting leaf litter like it was a magnet. She slumped, contemplating the death taste of the musty leaf matter when suddenly, an obese
orange tail flicked her in the nose.

"Marmalade! You're alive! How did you do that?" purred Bitssy after rubbing her head all over Marmalade’s lime stained, and very bad tasting body.

"Ohhhhhh, a catdog that purrs instead of bites," teased Marmalade, wrapping his beautiful strong tail around his fat haunches as he sat eyeball to eyeball with Bitssy. "How do you do that?"

Bitssy, excited and over the moon (which wasn't even out yet), ran around Marmalade in circles that got tighter and tighter. Then, just to really display her excitement, Bitssy did a couple of groovy mid air reverse flips that are usually only seen in the feline species when falling from great heights. Misjudging the distance, Bitssy ended up landing on top of Marmalade, who didn’t squirm, spit, and run off like the average cat would have done. Marmalade instead opened his mouth wide, poked out his sandpaper squid grey tongue, squinted his eyes as much as any fat cat could, and looked like he was praying to the cat Guru above.

Bit 4. Catmando and Reef Knots.
Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!
Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.
Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.
Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah
Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 4. Catmando and Reef Knots.

2007-01-24T06:54:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 4, Catmando and reef knots.

"Oh do stop flipping like a dying clown fish from the Great Barrier Reef will you! Come here, listen up, and I'll tell you how you’re dogging life, not behaving at all bravely, like the dingo that you look like.”

Marmalade licked his paw and ran it expertly along his eyelashes to make them glisten with knowledge.

“Catastrophe 1: Talk up will you, your bark is much worse than your bite, it just doesn’t exist!

Catastrophe 2: Learn to recognise a reef knot. It’s a strong boundary knot that will help to pull you, and me, out of trouble.

Catastrophe 3: Being scared doesn’t stop you from doing things, you just have to do them differently. And,

Catastrophe 4: Dream aplenty so that Catman-do and din-go anywhere they want.”

Bitssy had no idea what Marmalade was talking about. It sounded so, clever. No, so silly. No no, it sounded, plain weird. It was like a riddle that Bitssy had to work out to pass a test. She figured that Marmalade must have been very wise and that she’d remember the lessons if she ever needed them.

Bitssy and Marmalade became the best of friends, inseparable and loyal (except when it came to seafood for dinner because they both loved it). Despite their differences over prawns and fishy bitties, Bitssy had the greatest respect for Marmalade and yearned for his long and unscheduled visits. That Marmalade had a life! He would go wherever, and whenever, he wanted.

“Cat-man-do and din-go,” Bitssy played it over and over in her mind like a favourite CD track on repeat.

“I wonder if that means cat man do and dingo go wherever they want?”

Oh how Bitssy wanted to do that, to check that the world out front was safe. If only it wasn't for Caramel……….

Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!
Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.
Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.
Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah
Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 5. Bitssy Gets it Good!

2007-01-23T07:56:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 5, Bitssy gets it good!

On a starlit tropical night some few weeks later, as the provoking fresh and sweet smells of frangipanis and mangos were drifting in through the screens daring Bitssy to come outside and play, an angry voice from the kitchen halted her in her stride.

"No! Do not call here again. I do not want to change telephone companies. I have told you five times already. Good bye!"

Slam went the telephone, marching went the big person, up went the music, slide went the windows, and pling went the sound of the air conditioner being turned on.

“Air conditioner!” caught on Bitssy, “Fantastic!”

Heartened by the knowledge that her big person was about to sit on the lounge for a cool cuddle, Bitssy raced to the comfy chair in front of the television. The chair that always had a semi chewed rawhide bone and was beside the antique glass cabinet with all its treasures twinkling out happily. But happy and cool was not the order of the evening.

"Not yet," snapped the usually patient and cooperative big person to Bitssy as she attempted to commandeer all of the chair, "I'm too hot!"

Shaken up and knotted on her insides by her big person's rejection, Bitssy sat, still. She felt confused by the angry tone, and cautiously watched her human’s every move. Her voice had sounded like the steam hissing and rising from hot concrete after a sudden downpour of rain. Did the big person not love her anymore? Why did her insides feel like a curdled milk shake being stirred by a thick-knotted rope? Was everything alright? Bitssy had never witnessed such ferocity, such Caramel-like scary behaviour, coming from her big person.

"I'm not going to take this," Bitssy's big person said out loud, in a rather annoyed voice. "This is my home, my space, my privacy: my barrier to the invading world. I will not have my boundaries interrupted by some pushy little man trying to get me to change phone companies. What do you think we should do Bitssy?"

Without waiting for an answer, up she got, marched back to the phone and called the company to tell them not to ever call her again.

"And I'm going to tell at least five friends not to change to you either!" Slam.

Bitssy, glued to the same spot, eyes as wide as a possum’s, was feeling really scared now. Her legs had that same jelly feeling that she got with Caramel. Her mind was racing around like a mouse on a wheel: no start, no end, and no escape. Her blood, rushing down through her body like rainwater racing for a storm drain, was cold, making her feet feel heavy and waterlogged. Inside her head a big piece of scratchy reef coral told her that things were out of place, not right.
“Stop. Stop,” she pleaded with her own fear. “You’re a Dingo. Be strong. Be fearless.”

Focusing on the way her wobbly body felt and wishing it to be as strong as steel, she reminded herself that she had no reason to fear her big person. Caramel? Yes, maybe. But her big person? No! She just needed to sort through these funny body feelings stirred up by the change in her big person. A light bulb began flickering in her mind. Bitssy glimpsed that the strange telephone situation was a little like her own fear of Caramel. Yes, that’s it! The big person did still love Bitssy, and she was just angered by something else, something threatening. Bitssy was wrongly reading the behaviour and thinking that she must have been in trouble for something she hadn’t done. The big person’s anger was meant for the man on the telephone, not for Bitssy! How could she have got is so mixed up? While Bitssy did have something to fear from Caramel, there was no real reason to fear the big person. The big person was sticking up for her rights, being assertive and strong. A Caramel alien had invaded the big person’s space and she just wasn’t standing for it.

“It’s okay,” Bitssy silently patted herself, her sides heaving in and out with short, sharp breaths. “It’s okay. You’re not in trouble.”

Bitssy had always been a deep thinker, a thinker who also loved to play, to be free, and to have friendships with everyone that she came across. There was nothing wrong with that combination. Despite Bitssy’s butterdog love of nature and play, her bottomless thinking was what really made her special. It wasn't really the way she looked, or her friendliness to everyone, animal and human. It was her amazing ability to see things for what they really were - once she slowed down a little and had a chance to think about it.

Bitssy had been thinking a lot about Caramel lately, about how Marmalade could come and go to the front yard, and survive to spit out another chewy Caramel story. There was no caramel sticking Marmalade’s teeth together though. Once he got started on the subject there was nothing holding his mouth shut. He could even word vomit about Caramel while he was eating his favourite food!

Marmalade said that he wasn't scared of Caramel because he knew that Bitssy's front yard wasn't Caramel's front yard. It was personal space that belonged to the people who lived at 222 Jensen Street. Marmalade had helped Bitssy to understand it by using the example of why big people shut the door when they went to the toilet. It was because it was their private space, just like the day they first met and Marmalade said he didn’t like people watching him when he was toileting. That’s why front yards had fences too, to tell people that it was private space. That’s why people wore clothes too, to tell others that the parts covered by clothing were private. They would not be shared with anyone at all!!!!!! Bitssy figured that her neck must be a private body part then, because she always wore a beautiful red collar. Marmalade just laughed and told Bitssy she was funny. He then went into a long boring explanation about why humans don’t like dogs sniffing their butts – it’s because humans refuse to speak animal language and they think that just by wearing pants, dogs will get the message that it is their body space, no sniffing allowed. But after checking out that you’re safe, dogs just sniff to say hello and to make friends. Wouldn’t you think the big people would let the dogs know they don’t like the butt sniffs? Like they could say: no, stop, go away. Save that sniffing for the dogs thanks! Big people use words, dogs sniff. It’s natural.

Marmalade also expertly told an outrageous story about a time he was stalking a rat for dinner. The rat, escaping with pure rat cunning, jumped from a tree and looked like it was going to land in the back of the farmer’s truck. Being quick, young, handsome and agile, Marmalade outsmarted the ratty thinking and tried to land in position first. Imagine… waiting in the back of the truck, open mouthed, as the rat dropped straight into the jaws of death! However, that damn farmer had one of those new fangled burglar alarms on his truck, the kind that went off the moment the truck was touched. So there’s Marmalade, all cool like, knowing he’s got tucker covered and the blinking alarm goes off, just as Marmalade lands in the back tray. It scares the cat out of him and he’s straight off the side and running for his life, in the opposite direction of the rat.

Why did the alarm go off? Because it was the farmer’s truck silly! He owned it and he didn’t want anyone to touch it or be in his space. Bitssy found this all too difficult to understand but she knew she wanted to be like Marmalade when she grew up: free and wise, with plenty of her own body space stories to tell!

Bitssy's mind clicked over as she thought about the similarities between Marmalade’s go where he wants behaviour and stories, filthy Caramel, and the big person's scary telephone call. And then, like a fluorescent spotlight pinpointing the darkest thought in her mind, Bitssy got it. She got it good. She understood what she had to do, and she would no longer be scared. She would be a strong body from Dog’s Body. She would turn the light on Caramel, show everyone how black she was, and let Caramel know about private body space on the front verandah of 222. She would try something different: she would use her body to speak to Caramel, to let her know that this was Bitssy’s world (and Marmalade’s and the big person’s too).

Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.

Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.

Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah

Bit 9. Snot Nice

Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.

Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.

Bit 12. A Dog's Body

Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.

Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 6. Clown Fish Won't Survive in Limejuice.

2007-01-22T10:27:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 6, Clown fish won’t survive in limejuice.

When Bitssy was still a wee puppy, living in Brisbane, she had formed Dog’s Body, a watchdog group armed with the protective force of multiple members. The dogs all watched out for each other and kept their lines of communication open by bark passing their messages through the town.

In Cairns, although very happy, Bitssy sometimes felt alone, separated from her earlier friends. Feeling a bit down in the dumps, like her heart was a big heavy rock, Bitssy wandered down the back yard looking for a grasshopper or an emerald green Christmas beetle to brighten her up. Just as she was about to stick her nosy snout under the beautiful, flowering Crimson Impatiens, it was struck with a small, orange, hand of velvet.

"Marmalade!" gushed Bitssy, "Where have you been for so long?" The two friends hugged, engaging in a feat of acrobatics that looked as though they were wrestling each other, in the garden bed, squashing the fragile Impatiens. Oops, no cut flowers for the tea table tonight.

"Marmalade! I have missed you so much. Come and tell me all your new stories of rat chasing in the sugar cane fields. You’re as fat as a devil so you must have some delicious and alarming stories to tell."

Marmalade meowed and meowed, just like a kitten caught up a tree, eager to be back in his own safe little space.

"Bitssy," Marmalade complained, "I have missed you more this trip than I have ever missed you before. Come, come, let’s jump the side gate and take up residence on the front verandah so that all the street can see that I'm home."

The two friends freestyled toward the side gate. Right at the last minute, just as Marmalade launched himself into the air like a missile looking for a target, Bitssy hit the skids, and slid right smack bang into the gate.

"Yelp!" cried Bitssy, a piece of grass hanging from her nose like a long stream of wandering green nose waste that had lost its way in a sneezing rush. She had tried to use her nose like an anchor, to slow down her speeding excitement, but the memory of the danger over the fence was what really stopped her plain sailing and brought her back to port.

Marmalade, balancing still as a statue on an awfully thin and drooping lime tree branch (already weighted down by limes), surveyed the scene of Bitssy below and quickly decided that Bitssy was, well, a complete dork!

"Merr, merr, merr, cough." A noise like a car engine trying to kick over sounded from Marmalade’s mouth. "Merr, merr, merr, hahaha, hahaha." Not only did the merriment shake the limes from their sanctuary, but Marmalade was now laughing so hard, that he too dropped from the lime tree, straight into the front yard’s, colourful and woody crotons below. He was crowded over by the beautiful, thick, yellow and red huge waxy leaves but Bitssy could easily locate him in the shuddering laughing bright shrub.

"Hahahaha, tehee, hee, merr, merr, merr."

Marmalade was rolling around with laughter so much that he looked like he was competing for a Guinness World Book of Record attempt at making lime juice! The limes underneath the crotons were being catapulted in all directions at an amazingly fast rate. As they hit their targets, they split and squirted their tangy acidic juice with stinging precision.

Bitssy, a little baffled and overpowered by the stinging lime nuclear missiles that exploded upon impact with her body, cocked her head to the side while she tried to work out Marmalade's condition. Squinting her eyes for protection, she judged that, no, Marmalade wasn't hurt, or drunk. Marmalade was just, well, a croton cretin! Bitssy jumped, front legs on top of the gate, back feet firmly planted on the ground lest she also have a lime collapse like poor Marmalade, and began laughing over the gate at her friend.

"Marmalade, you big old tom cat. I think you're the clown fish today. Now stop liming down and come back here before you explode like a puffer fish washed up on the beach."

At those endearing words, Marmalade mustered his humour into control, and flick, was on the top of the gate lovingly sharing his lime-slimed head against Bitssy's.

"Bitssy," dripped Marmalade (yes, actually dripped, Marmalade had little drips of limey saliva falling from his tongue). "You are my best friend. I adore you and I am going to tell you just what I think of you and your clown fish thinking. See that magnificent botanic recreational area for grubs out there? That's your front yard Bitssy. That's a place you're allowed to go. That's your body, buddy. That's your spot."

Bitssy nearly unbalanced Marmalade with the huge lick that she planted on his head. What a mistake! After spitting out the burning, sour lime juice, she trotted toward her back verandah to sprawl out on her little round trampoline, the one with a really soft and comforting sheepskin on it. Bitssy only ever went near it when she needed to think (and on this occasion to roll off the lime juice).

Bitssy settled in to think. Marmalade spoke the truth as usual. Bitssy had every right to play in her own front yard. Bitssy had to practise being that strong and assertive dog from Dog’s Body: the dog that drew on her own inner strength backed up by sound safety thinking skills. Bitssy would start that very afternoon, right after she had a little nap.

Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.
Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah
Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 7. The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.

2007-01-21T06:30:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 7, The Mellow Yellow Prophecy.

The sound of a familiar car in the driveway stirred Bitssy and Marmalade from their hilarious dreams about Marmalade’s exploits on his latest travel adventure. Running to the side gate, the big person greeted them with the same liveliness that they greeted her.

"Hello my babies," she crooned, "it's so good to come home. Hello Marmalade. For a stray cat you're awfully well fed. Must be plenty of rats around, hey! What’s that strong smell? Have you two been making lime drinks to burn off some rat fat?"

The big person laughed at her joke, picked Marmalade up, hugged him tightly until his eyes almost popped out and his fat little legs jiggled helplessly like a baby being smothered by a giant. She devotedly scratched Bitssy behind her ear, just the way Bitssy loved it, and gazed into her flawless, strong brown eyes.

"Hello darling. Lets get a beer, go sit on the front verandah, and watch the flying foxes take off for the night."

As Bitssy's big person unlocked the back door and held it open for the two friends to enter the house, Bitssy's mind raced.

"Now's my chance. It's the moment for my strength to shine out, to finally sparkle. A test for my inner strength. Now's my opportunity to face my fear...to face Caramel on MY front verandah and to really check that all is sweet outside my front door.”

Bitssy hesitated on the doorframe to think more. A timid, harmless little house spider retreated in haste across her paw but she jumped as though she’d been spooked by a ghost.

“No, I can’t do it,” Bitssy gulped as she swapped power for panic, her jerking ears, wilted tail and darting eyes plainly showing her alarm like a clock’s unwelcome calling first thing in the morning. “Caramel makes things all wrong. It’s all wrong. Caramel will hurt me, and my family."

Both the big person and Marmalade watched Bitssy. It was as though they could read her mind as well as her body. Marmalade’s own early warning signs kicked in and his tail began to flicker.
Upset, a look of rude annoyance crept over his face.

"Come on Bitssy," Marmalade snarled with his entire body, "I want to sit with you on your front verandah." If Marmalade had been able to cross his arms on his chest, stick his nose in the air, and close his eyes to everything that was going on around him, he would have done so: just to prove that he was poopy!

"What's wrong Bitssy? Not still scared of that yellow Caramel are you?" guessed the big person, "Caramel will do as she's told. To break her power over you, you just have to politely tell her to pull her head in and to let her know that we support you. After all Bitssy, it is your front verandah."

Bitssy gulped, trembling, "Oh no. I'm not ready, I'm not ready."

Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah

Bit 9. Snot Nice

Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.

Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.

Bit 12. A Dog's Body

Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.

Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 8. Poison Snake Catches a Rat on the Front Verandah

2007-01-20T07:35:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 8, Poison snake catches a rat on the front verandah.

Marmalade and the big person sat together in the swinging love seat on Bitssy's front verandah. Caramel was there too, warily keeping her distance while she judged the situation to see if the big person was a threat to her. The big person stroked Marmalade and talked to him about all the yummy food he had missed. She told him about the left over trifle from a special birthday dinner, about how Bitssy gobbled the leftovers and slept for hours in the mud hole under the house. Marmalade encouraged the storytelling by rubbing himself against the big person and purring as loud as an overhead plane.

Caramel confidently approached the big person for a bit of a rough up. She had decided that she would be able to fool the big person into liking her and that she would soon have her eating out of her paw. Yes, she could groom her into accepting that she was a lovely, sweet dog, in whose mouth butter would not melt. Just as the big person extended her arm to give Caramel a neighbourly head rub, Marmalade sprang to life, his four feet together, tightly, hair on end like an Echidna’s spikes, back arched, and hissed like a volcano letting off steam. Caramel and the big person stopped, a little taken aback by the interruption.

Nothing. Caramel took another step toward the big person, her phony smiling face looking all innocent, and Marmalade released his full meaning of the interruption. He struck and spat. His chubby little front leg was like a deadly snake striking, quick and purposeful. He didn't actually strike Caramel, didn't want to hurt her, just provided her with an assured, "No. This is our boundary. You won’t trick me with your slimy, friendly behaviour."

Nobody was sure what to do. Marmalade skillfully used his body signs to make it clear that he meant business, that Caramel had no place near the big person. Still arched with his hair on end, Marmalade began a continuous, low growl. Cowardly, like the yellow marshmallow that she really was, Caramel hung her head, tail between her legs, and stepped off the verandah. She walked around and around, softening up a patch of grass, shot a deadly look toward Marmalade, and plopped, seemingly dejected, onto the ground. A low toned “grrumph” escaped from
Caramel’s snout like the noise a child makes when they discover there are no Smarties left in the packet.

The big person laughed. She flung her head back, opened her mouth wide, and laughed. The fillings in her back teeth looked like little silver fish and Marmalade wondered whether he should jump in and catch them.

"You tell her, Marmalade. This is our space. Go boy. No body gets to touch my body while old Marmalade’s around."

Marmalade quickly reconsidered that he probably shouldn’t jump into the big person’s mouth for a fishing expedition, and the big person smoothed Marmalade’s crinkled spiky hair.

“That Caramel’s got more front tooth than a carnivorous rat, hasn’t she Marmalade? I think she’s just run into the rat trap though.”

Placing her beer on the side table, she used both hands to cup Marmalade’s head and kiss his velvety little nose. Craning her neck to make eye contact, she looked back toward Bitssy, alert and silent on the inside of the front screen door.

"Hey Bitss, what did you think about that?"

And think Bitssy did. She had soaked up the entire scene, soaked up how confident Marmalade was. He was like a bus sticking to its timetable. Most curious though, was that Marmalade had the full support of the big person. Even though the big person did not dislike Caramel, she just seemed to understand that Caramel didn't belong there and couldn’t do bad things on Bitssy’s front verandah. Despite Caramel’s sugar coating, she knew there was stale, mouldy bread underneath.

"Meow, come on Bitssy. From out here you can see the undertaker birds poking the ground for grubs, the flying foxes swooping for choice positions, and you can see those kids across the road playing in the pool. Come on out to the cool world, Bitssy."

Poor Bitssy. She quivered with excitement, and wanted to bound through the door, but Caramel was still there. Still waiting to sweetly destroy her, lick her lips and walk elegantly back across the road as though nothing had happened. Despite the believable feeling of the black, offensive, stinkin’ thinkin’ that was clogging up Bitssy's mind, she kept trying to convince herself,

"This is my home, my space, my privacy. If anything bad happens I'll just tell my big person and Marmalade. They'll help me."

Cross-eyed and exhausted with fighting her own unbearable dark thoughts, Bitssy opted for a nap. All of the strange feelings inside her were just too big and heavy. They made Bitssy feel as though she had run a marathon, in the middle of a thunderstorm, ducking the lightening strikes and being crippled by the deafening thunder. Curled up on the rug just inside the front door, Bitssy nodded off to the sounds of Marmalade and the big person enjoying their own space and experiencing all that was well in the sweltering tropical paradise.

Bit 9. Snot Nice
Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 9. Snot Nice

2007-01-19T08:02:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 9, Snot Nice.
Hearing young voices, close, very close, Bitssy awoke to find two beautiful children standing at the edge of her front verandah. It was the enticing children from across the road, Cindy and Matty. Cindy was tall and slim, with shoulder length chestnut hair that glistened like the dark red cherries hidden in a Christmas trifle. She had a little scar on her chin that looked like a crevice that a baby gecko might hide in.

“Ohhh, I’d like to lick that,” thought Bitssy cheerfully.

Matty was a short, wide little person, even his hair was shorter and his pants wider. He was colour coordinated with a lickable, yellow, bubbly soda stream running from his nose. Bouncy yellow plastic rings around his upper arms and poking through the top of his pants, made him look like one of the Teletubbies on television or the Incredible Hulk with yellow fever. Both of the children had pearls of twinkling soft, silver dewdrops all over their tanned bodies. They wore little clothing, just enough to cover their private parts. That's right, before Bitssy went to sleep, Marmalade had said he could see the children swimming in their pool.

Bitssy was up and panting at the screen. Her tail was on high, creating a breeze that could cool a sweltering room. The big person was cheerily talking to the children, and then the children noticed Bitssy.

"Hello Bitssy," blurted Matty excitedly, walking toward the screen door.

"Don’t let her out Matty," chided Cindy, hands on her hips, and lips making a thin straight line like she’d just sucked a lime, "she's not allowed out the front."

"It's okay, Cindy," said the big person whilst looking pointedly at Bitssy, "Bitssy is allowed out front, she just chooses not to come and join us."

Matty wiped his nose with the back of his hand and opened the screen door, just a crack. Without a moment’s thought, Bitssy pushed boldly through. She licked Matty on the hand, licked him a second time because he tasted so nice, knocked him senseless with her passionate tail and headed straight into the wet, welcoming arms of Cindy.

"Hello girl. You're beautiful. Don’t lick, don’t lick, snot nice. Want to come and play ball with Matty and me?"

Matty pulled a sodden yellow tennis ball from out of the front of his bulging swimming togs and threw it toward Cindy. Given that Cindy's arms were full of Bitssy, she luckily missed the ball and it rolled off the edge of the verandah, straight into the grimy paws of Caramel.

“Errh, Matty, didn’t you have that ball down your pants? Near your penis? Matty’s got a penis, Matty’s got a penis,” Cindy rudely teased and embarrassed Matty.

Matty hung his head and stuck his bottom lip out like a fish taking a final gasp of air. Eyes downcast, arms hanging sadly by his sides he quietly said,

“Don’t say that Cindy. I’m going to tell on you.”

Caramel didn’t care what the ball was near. She eagerly slobbered bacteria and slime all over the ball. She looked expectantly toward the children while sending a quick, sly little side winding glance of “Ha, ha, I’ll get you,” to Marmalade.

Looking down and seeing only Caramel with the ball, Matty decided that she was much worse than his sister.

"Not you, Caramel. Go home. You're a pest," he said as he sniffed a soft yellow candle back up his nose, and feeling happier already, merrily picked at the sore that was beginning to form just on the inside of his nostril.

"Yeah Caramel, you don’t live here. This is Bitssy’s and Marmalade’s yard," echoed Cindy.

Marmalade was sitting back with a grin that belonged to the Cheshire cat. "Welcome to the front world," he purred. "Welcome to a world that belongs to you. Bring your body here, buddy, and enjoy your space."

Bitssy was standing on her front verandah for the first time ever! She looked with new eyes upon the fantastic scene before her; playful children, happy and relaxed big person, and a big, fat, orange blob who looked like he'd won a sack full of rats on a chocolate wheel. Bitssy took a deep breath and was just about to woof her happy thoughts. But then, she saw Caramel. Caramel, crouched low on the ground, eyes focused on Bitssy's throat, filthy teeth exposed in a grimace, and waiting, just waiting for Bitssy to move forward.

Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.
Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 10. Hot Toast with Vegemite.

2007-01-18T11:33:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 10, Hot toast with vegemite.

Bitssy was terrified. She could only think of having her throat ripped out by a mangy yellow monster. Solid with fear and unable to move her head, Bitssy's eyes darted around the unfamiliar setting. She could see the front fence, a barrier to her escape to the front. A side fence, sentried by dark spiky unfamiliar plants, acted as another barrier. The timber wall to her immediate right side blocked the view of any other means of escape and became a torture holding cell.

Her heart, pounding in her throat, spurted overheated plasma into her ears and brain. Bitssy could feel herself going faint with alarm.

"I'm going to die," she thought sadly to herself, "I'm going to be murdered and nobody will help me."

The big person had an amazing ability to understand Bitssy's body language. She gently reached out to stroke Bitssy.

"Come over here, my darling Bitssy. Come and sit with me." She patted the space right beside herself and then scratched Bitssy behind her ear. "Come on Bitssy, come and help me watch the children play."

Still frozen with terror, Bitssy just stood, silently crying and hoping that Caramel wouldn't hurt her big person, Marmalade or the children.

"I love them so much," Bitssy thought, "I hope they know that."

Bitssy forced her head to move, to make final eye contact with the big person she loved most. Caramel quietly growled, and Bitssy felt the warm stream of urine run down her two back legs and pool around her back feet. Her long furry tail, usually erect and wagging, now hung limp and dragged in the urine.

Matty began to laugh, "Look, look, Bitssy peed herself. Yuck. Bitssy peed herself."

"Oh gross," Cindy squealed loudly enough for the entire street to hear, "Bitssy did a pee. That's disgusting."

Poor Bitssy. Never had she felt so ashamed and such a failure, so weak and badly behaved in front of the people she loved most. Her fear though, was gigantic. It towered way above her embarrassment, and she could do nothing to soothe it. She still stood, shaking, and just wanted to die quickly.

The big person jumped up from her chair and hugged Bitssy.

"It's okay my darling. It's okay. You're safe with us. Don’t you worry about peeing on the verandah. I'll clean it up."

Just like a fussy, do everything right Mother, Cindy complained, “But the germs? Dog pee has bad things in it, things that can make you sick and weak and I don’t want to catch an awful thing!”

“Don’t you be too concerned about that Cindy. There’s all sorts of ways to get rid of germs. I’m not about to let you become sick while you’re at my house.”

The big person stood and walked the full two strides to the front door. Opening the screen and stepping inside, Bitssy saw her chance. This was it. Escape. Escape back into a world where she was safe. Just as Bitssy was ready to run, helpful little Matty grabbed Bitssy by the collar and began to lead her away from the urine germ puddle. Her head was competing in a tug-a-war of choice. Bitssy wasn't sure whether to run for the door with Matty dragging behind her, or to growl and warn Matty off so that she could escape. Bitssy knew she couldn't do that. How could she ever growl at a child or leave them to be savaged by the monster? In the split seconds that it took these thoughts to play through Bitssy's mind, it was too late. The big person was inside and the screen door had closed.

Bitssy faced her fear. She turned and looked toward Caramel. Caramel also saw her chance and flew straight for Bitssy. A terrible fight erupted, like a volcano spewing its fury over all in its path. Caramel had Bitssy pinned to the ground, against the wall, and was ripping into Bitssy's ear and neck. The sound of tearing flesh and ripping muscle was louder than thunder on a dark, dark night. Blood was flicking toward all points of the compass and the early evening curlews began their sorrowful death cry.

Bitssy, knowing she was finished and about to go to dog heaven, gave up. Somewhere far away, behind the funeral call of the curlews, Bitssy could faintly hear the voices of children, her big person and the ferocious growls of a violent wild wolverine. Louder than anything else though was a voice within Bitssy's own head, "my home, my space, and my privacy".

That one loud little voice travelled throughout Bitssy's body like the warming feeling of hot toast and vegemite. Perhaps it was the vitamin B from the vegemite, or perhaps it was Bitssy's belief in her own space, but whichever it was, it gave Bitssy courage; courage to not die, but to tell Caramel to back off.

Bitssy fought to her feet, smashing the crushing steel hunter’s trap from her leg. She became aware that her friends were trying to drag Caramel off her, the big person fully entangled in the momentary pause of the fight and Cindy, screaming and whacking into Caramel with a wire broom. Bitssy shook her ear free from Caramel’s filthy mouth, threw back her head and loosed the wolves that had been hiding deep inside the fear spot in her stomach. The wolves galloped out of Bitssy's mouth, free at last.

"Don’t touch me Caramel. Not ever," Bitssy howled. "This is my body. My home. My space. My privacy. Leave nooooowwwwwww!"

Her power regained with the assistance of the wild, pack hunting wolves, Bitssy looked at the scene around her. The children, big person and Marmalade were all still on hyper alert, somewhat like wolves themselves. They were waiting for Caramel to dare to break the power of Bitssy's inner strength. Caramel did again growl and flash her thunderous eyes, until she saw the raised broom quickly losing altitude from Cindy's determined little arms. Matty’s stout little leg, raised in a kickboxing position, was just waiting to place that final wolf attack into the monster’s heel. Defeated by all the arrows fired at her, Caramel slinked away, humiliated that she wasn’t top dog, dragging her bruised feelings along the ground. A bull ant must have stung her on her soft underbelly because Caramel yelped, did a high somersault and ran across the road, whimpering, her tail between her legs.

Matty begun to laugh and jump up and down, filling his mouth with stretchy, sticky nose mucus that clung to anything it touched, "Look, look, Caramel peed herself! Yuck. Caramel peed herself."

Not in the least worried by flicking mucus or yellow pee, Bitssy was trying to move her broken, injured body so that she could make eye contact with the wolverine that had come to visit just at the right time. She wanted to thank the creature for helping the others to scare Caramel off. But the wolverine must have already made its escape, revolted by Caramel’s unneighbourly behaviour, because there was no wolverine to be seen in her immediate support group.

Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.
Bit 12. A Dog's Body
Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 11. Off Caramel Smells Like Rotting Lime.

2007-01-17T08:23:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 11, Off Caramel smells like rotting lime.

After the vet had stitched Bitssy's ear, back, and legs, tended to her neck puncture wounds, and given her a tetanus and antibiotic shot mixed with a sleeping potion, he was invited to stay and have an evening meal with the close little group. The children’s parents had come over in response to the distressing sounds of the dogfight and the curlews’ urgent call for help. After they locked Caramel into her own yard and angrily told the Caramel owners what had happened, the children’s parents were also invited to stay to tea. Before any food preparation though, the parents were provided with a box of tissues to mop up Matty’s wandering nose mess!

The children were given the task of decorating the Christmas tree while the adults together prepared dinner and talked adult talk about the dogfight. They quietly pondered over which department to tell, to have something done about the Jensen St yellow menace and whether the doctor would be able to see Matty tomorrow and give him a script for antibiotics! While
everyone was chatting, Bitssy’s big person snuck into her bedroom and made a call to report Caramel’s violence. There was no way she would allow her Bitssy to be further terrorised by the Jensen St terror.

Partly because the space was needed for the Christmas tree and mostly because everyone loved Bitssy, she was awarded the throne of achievement, the comfy favourite inside chair from beside the antique glass cabinet. After proudly drawing everyone’s attention to Bitssy’s Private Stripe awarded to her for services towards others’ rights, the big person dragged the chair out and placed it under the fan in the middle of the front verandah. The group, huddled as one, toasted Bitssy’s bravery with home made lime and honey cordial. They raised their glasses, said wonderful things about her courage and her inner strength, clinked their glasses together and drank in Bitssy’s release from her own prison.

Bitssy, her head resting on the arm of the chair, looked back at her human saviours, listened to the excited voices of the children discovering precious decorations, and wondered why she had taken so long to tell Caramel to can it. Even though standing up to Caramel had hurt her, Bitssy knew it would be better in the long run: the only way to stop Caramel’s control. If she hadn't gone out to the front verandah, these sounds of wonderment, joy and people coming
together wouldn't be happening.

Satisfied and proud of herself and her comrades, Bitssy fell asleep, curled around her watchful best friend. Swallowed up by her drug induced sleep, Bitssy’s poor little body quivered and shook while she dreamt of wolves: freedom messengers that demanded being listened to and being given plenty of space to roam her mind without anything killing them off or controlling them. They told Bitssy that her Australian Indigenous birthright had all the answers: her
dreaming. She had to listen and act upon it. She is a dingo, an Australian wolf, a creature skilled with sensing and carving out her territory, acting to defend it, and leading the fight for universal freedom without any other creature chaining her up and treating her like a caged Cockatoo at the zoo. Bitssy tried to roll over and shake the wolverdreaming from her brain. The wolves growled at this disobedience, and showed her a picture of the Great Barrier Reef, a place protected by a barrier, a safe place where if you fish, you will be fined. Bitssy was in this dream picture, not as a clown fish, but as the boundary hunter, protecting the fish.

Fuzzy headed from vet drugs and in a little pain, Bitssy awoke from her weird dream to the sounds of goodbyes. The mosquitos were abuzz with night-time gossip and the candles throughout the front garden had burned down, now looking like tiny ground fairies swaying to the music of the hot tropical jungle. The parents of the sleepy children were taking them home to be tucked into their beds and the vet stroked Bitssy's head, promising that she would soon feel better and that Caramel would get what she deserved.

Marmalade, noticing that top dog was finally awake, licked Bitssy's forelegs. He was purring and encouraging by his presence. Brave Marmalade had taken the uncomfortable position of guarding Bitssy on the front verandah while she slept off the vet’s sedative and pain-killer. Bitssy greatly appreciated his role, particularly given that the big people had cooked seafood for dinner, prawn toast even. Bitssy supposed that the alluring smell must have been rather difficult for Marmalade to stay away from and was wholly grateful for Marmalade’s surrender to personal duty.

"Thank you, Marmalade, you little wolf," croaked Bitssy softly, "Thank you for helping me to get what I wanted most: a life like you have. A life where I know what is mine and what I have to do to make sure no dog takes advantage of me or anyone else. All I had to do was to listen to my dingo instincts about right and wrong, to tell Caramel to back off, and to rely upon my pack of friends to support me. I love you, Marmalade, and now I'm going to kiss you."

Just as Bitssy was about to deposit her long, hot, dry, sick tongue on Marmalade's head, Marmalade lifted her front paw, claws extended and lightly swiped Bitssy on an unhurt part of her nose.

"Back off Bitssy. This is my body and you can’t touch it!"

Shocked, and a little taken aback, Bitssy looked deep into Marmalade’s eyes. When she saw the twinkle and recognised that the cat was just playing, she laughed so hard that tears ran from her eyes, both from joy and pain.

"Hey, hey, wolf dog," growled Marmalade, "Now I'm not joking. You're howling on my body and I don’t like it. Why don’t you just give me a wolf whistle if you love me that much!"

Marmalade jumped down from their love seat, swayed to the front fence and turned his back toward the house across the road. Eyes closed, nose in the air, and a look of untamed daring on his face, Marmalade sprayed a huge smelly tomcat pee.

Wiggling his backside he defiantly said, "Night Caramel. Sniff on this while your butt’s still toasting. This is our barrier and you aint comin’ back!"

Smelling his own territorial mark before covering it over, Marmalade screwed up his nose and complained,

“Phew, smells like rotting citrus. No need to cover this up. Hey, hey, yellow mellow, here’s the lime. Don’t step over it!”

Laughing like a pair of kookaburras, the friends scratched at the door, the front door, to indicate that they wanted re-entry into their cave, and preferably a big plate of prawn toast and scallop mornay.

Eyes spaced wide from shock and leaning against the wall for support, Bitssy tried to copy the big people’s way of showing respect:

“I toast you, Marmalade.”

“Of course you do, Bitssy. You mean you want to leave me the biggest bit of prawn toast, don’t you!”

Not being able to wink like humans when they joke, Marmalade wagged his tail cheekily, like a playful dog, and sped through the door the moment it was opened, straight to the kitchen with the yummy, toasty smell.

Bit 12. A Dog's Body

Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.

Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 12. A Dog's Body

2007-01-16T06:57:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 12, A dog’s body

After the Christmas barbeque, while all the children were playing cricket in the back neighbour’s yard, Bitssy and her next door dogs sat together in the far adjoining corners of their fields of dreams. They discussed Bitssy whipping Caramel’s yellow butt by just standing up to her and how everydogbody needs their own space. The burning sun kept attempting to break up the focused friends by peeping in through the breaks in the shade, looking for a chance to send outdoor nature lovers scurrying for the safety of a house. Whereas the sun convinced the children and the parents to move around, the Dog’s Body Army sat stoic and attentive, like golden wolves on watch.

“I always knew you would get to go into the front world, Bitssy. I couldn't understand why you were so scared. Do you have any idea how many more frogs live out front? These crazy kids scare them to death in the backyard. Our little green mates have to stay out front to survive."

A cricket ball hit the fence, right beside the nature loving dog speaker’s back,

"See what I mean?" he winked one of his bloodshot hound dog eyes. He chuckled slowly, deep and cheekily. "These kids scare the death out of me. Hey you kids, want the ball?"

Mr Speaker picked the ball up in his slobbery, rubbery mouth, dropped his front legs to the ground, bum and wagging tail up and dared the kids to come catch. Just as a freckled little girl approached, her hat slipped down over one of her eyes like an eye patch, Mr Speaker ran for his life. Dashing in the opposite direction, he looked back to ensure that the girl child was giving chase.

“Come on girl, come get the ball,” Mr Speaker teasingly garbled through ball-clad teeth and hot dog spit backwashes that only a basset hound could produce. “Hey, I’ve got dog’s breath, I’ve got stinkin’ dog’s breath,” he proudly celebrated to the others. “Cool! Or hot! Or wicked! Or sick! Or puff! I dunno, I can’t work this big people talk out.”

The other three friends wagged with excitement and dreamt of jumping the fence to join the fun. Bitssy was thinking how wonderful it was to be brave and free. Her heart felt like it would burst into a full flowering sun jewel, a haven for ladybugs and pollinating honeybees. She was as free as a butterfly and as free as Marmalade. Her life was perfect. Her big person, her house, her front and back yard, the most wonderfully safe places in the world to be. This was her space and she loved it. In sheer glee Bitssy did jump the fence and joined the chaotic, yet fun, ball hunt.

Jules, the freckled and fast Mr Speaker chaser, ran toward Bitssy with her arms waving madly. Unsure of Jules’ one-eyed intentions and of what Jules might do to her, Bitssy stopped and cocked her head. Bitssy wanted to have some time to check the danger level before Jules got too close. Bitssy, practising being a full sensing wild dingo, didn’t feel any warning signs in her body about Jules. Normally Bitssy’s body would tingle, the hair on her back would stand up, her knees would turn weak, or she would feel like peeing if she sensed danger. No real danger. It was just that the girl child’s arms were waving around like a dragonfly doing aerial ballet of a suicide bombing nature and the crazy movement had startled Bitssy.

"Hey Bitss," puffed Jules, landing on her knees in front of Bitssy, all off balance like an emu thrown out of the back of a speeding ute, "Come,” puff, “play,” puff, “with us.” Puff, puff, puff. “Help me,” puff “get that ball."

Invitation extended, invitation accepted. Bitssy energetically leap-frogged toward the chase. She then stopped, suddenly. The hairs on her back stood up and her legs trembled like they did when she was cold. Her early warning signs of danger were there for all to see. Worse than the ball melting smell of Mr Speaker’s dog’s breath, was the scene that now attacked Bitssy’s eyes.

On the edge of the big people group, there stood Caramel. Caramel stared at Bitssy and licked her lips. Bitssy’s stinkin’ thinkin’ crept back in and, as she imagined another fight, she became very frightened. She wanted to pee and to return over the fence, to the safety of her back yard. Muddled by the great difference between her own inner fear talk that nobody else seemed to hear, and the very different merry sounds of the after Christmas lunch gathering that everyone could hear, Bitssy tried to feel the dingo power inside her. She tried to imagine what the wolves would have her do. In a moment of remembering, Bitssy tried to summon up the ghostly visiting wolverine, the one with the wild growls. It did not appear.

Sometimes it is easier to give in to old ways of doing things. Weak thoughts can swallow a vitamin boost of power and rapidly wrestle with strong feelings to trick and overpower them. Stinkin’ thinkin’ stinks! Once Bitssy’s weak thoughts had the hand of authority, savagely farting on her brain, her inner fight caved in to the rule of those lurking, rotten, hidden fears.

"Caramel will hurt me. I'm not in my yard. My big person is inside having a nap and Marmalade is doing a lazy Garfield on the chair. I'm all alone. These people won’t help me".

Caramel walked slowly and surely toward Bitssy, head low, her body language screaming volumes of aggression. Frozen with the fear of wrongly imagining what was going to happen, and deafened by the loud aggression leaping from Caramel’s hair, Bitssy stayed chained to the spot. When Caramel was only a dog’s length away, certainly within killing distance, her constant growling clear and threatening, Bitssy's sense of right and wrong began to return. It was almost as if Bitssy needed the growl of wrongness to awaken the voice of her slumbering rightness. A picture of herself as the boundary hunter, protecting the Great Barrier Reef, blew like fresh sea air into her brain. Suddenly she was a water wolf, rising up from the ocean and chasing the fishermen away. The powerful feelings that the water wolf gave Bitssy, chased her stinkin’ thinkin’ to an isolated and deserted island, patrolled by mutant, hungry, fear eating goannas. The island, surrounded by snapping waters full to overflowing with sharks and crocodiles, was impossible to escape from until fear was really needed. There fear cringed and fled from the light as it watched and listened to the voice of strength take control and become the winner.

Firmly standing her ground, head and shoulders on sentry duty, Bitssy now allowed her sleepy body rightness to be fully awoken by the rustling movement of wolf energy. The strength surged through her body like a bolt of lightening. Shaking off the clinging fear as it was being chased from the deepest, darkest, billabong of her dingo makeup, she breathed deeply and calmly and rethought her situation.

"Caramel can’t treat me like this. I might not be in my yard but it is not right to treat others this way. My space is one thing but this is my body, no matter where I am."

Bitssy's buried wolves came to her aid, rounding up her pack of assertive feelings, they tumbled from her jaws snapping the world to attention.

"That's enough, Caramel. I will not put up with your bullying and violence any longer. If you so much as touch a hair on my head, there are big people and other dogs here that will ensure that you do not leave the pound in a hurry. This is my body and I will take it where I want
without fear of you, or anyone else, hurting me. Go home, Caramel. You are not welcome here."

Caramel growled a mean, sly, laugh.

"You make me sick you stupid, skinny, bitsa. I think you'd better leave or I'll tear you to pieces. Look dogs, we've got a bitsa in our presence. Let’s teach her a lesson."

Looking around to the other dogs, Caramel was faced with their undivided and loyal support of Bitssy. After the front verandah bashing, the dogs had all decided that they would no longer be mates with Caramel. Caramel had to learn a lesson and withdrawing companionship was one very small thing they could all do together to stop her treachery. While Caramel thought she was still the Queen of Jensen St, the obvious support toward Bitssy was making Caramel look more like the Court jester.

"Come on pack, let’s get her," demanded Caramel of the other dogs.

Scared, but sure of her rights and body ownership, Bitssy did not move. She knew this was right and she was about to tell.

"Go home, Caramel. This is my body, my Dog’s Body. We look after each other to make sure that no-one is hurt." Bitssy threw her head upwards, her neck stretched to its full extent, and a
haunting dingo howl erupted from her throat. The big people stopped playing cricket and turned toward Bitssy. A couple of the children copied Bitssy, throwing their heads up and yowling too. One by one, the other dogs, Bitssy's Dog’s Body, joined the pack and the call of the wild rang out through Edge Hill. The chorus informed all the dogs of the suburb that Dog’s Body needed
collective support and that Caramel was wrong, she was causing trouble. Individually, all through the suburb, dogs recognised and answered the call. Caramel’s reign of terror was over.

Marmalade and Bitssy's big person dashed out onto their back verandah. Marmalade, fatter than ever after six pieces of smoked salmon on toast, recognised the scene before him.
Instinctively, he knew that Bitssy's fear of Caramel had gone for good. Those wolves were finally out of jail and were running, free, along the changing landscapes of Australia, just like dingoes were meant to. Never again would Bitssy needlessly be scared of something that she had some power of self-control over. Never would she give in to something that wanted to be kept scary and private. She would from now on tell others so that she could lessen the fear and send it off to the deserted island. Never again would her fear talk win above her understanding of right, wrong, and forced control.

Marmalade, fat as a desk general, stood to attention (a bow in his back created by his over filled tummy dragging on the ground). Tail straight to the ceiling, he threw back his head and let go a huge “meeeeeeeeooooooowwwwwww.”

"I salute you, Bitssy."

Observing Caramel slinking away from the house, unsure of exactly what had happened but proud of Bitssy nonetheless, the big person called her. Waving to her neighbours over the fence, she caught sight of a magnificent Christmas pavlova on their table, and remembered that she hadn’t yet had dessert.

“Come on Bitssy, darling. You and Marmalade come inside now, into the air conditioning, and we’ll have a bowl of caramel whip for Christmas afternoon tea. We could even have some toasted caramel in lime coconut, just to celebrate.”

Bitssy’s dog friends looked from one to another and began rolling around the grass laughing, backs wriggling like a semi with an extended trailer turning a corner, front one way, rear the other, and their legs doing circles in the air like they were riding a bike. Bitssy, although seeing the funny side of the dessert offer, did not immediately join the joke. She was proud of her own brave achievement, knew she had done the right thing, but she also felt a wee stab of sadness and loneliness for Caramel. Caramel who had no sweetness in her life, no pack to love her, no-one to share Christmas goodies with, and no dog who would ever put up with her bullying again. How could she eat caramel at an important time like this? Trifle though, if there was any trifle she’d have a bowl of that thanks!

Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.
Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.
Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 13. The Goodbye Van.

2007-01-15T12:52:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 13, The goodbye van.

On Boxing Day, there was a most unusual occurrence in Jensen St, Edge Hill. Bitssy and Marmalade, in the front yard, were playfully teasing a cheeky little willy wag tail. The tiny black and white bird appeared to be jealously guarding a swarm of termites disrupted by a tropical storm and was most upset by the presence of a cat and dog in her vicinity.

Although Marmalade may have caused a real threat by fortune of being an advanced feline hunter, he was far too obese and lazy to take on tree climbing or termite tasting! And Bitssy, well, she couldn't hurt a flea. She just wanted to play, to be happy, to be free.

The little willy waggy was dive-bombing the friends every time they approached the front fence. In delight they would pretend run away frightened, hide behind a shrub, wait until the waggy settled, and then dash for the fence again. It was a great game. Great, that was, until Marmalade spotted Caramel staring at Bitssy hungrily from the roadside of the fence.

"That's right, Caramel," hissed the cat. "You stay on that side of the fence. You're not
welcome here. Stay there and make like you’re a termite mound. Be sort of enjoyable to see your antics when a termite crawls up your nostril."

Bitssy remained playing. She paid no heed of Caramel, felt no fear, and certainly did not have any hatred toward the poor yellow dog. However, Bitssy had noticed a white, smoke blowing van coming up the road toward them. Bitssy was fairly sure she recognised the smell of the disgusting pollution billowing from the exhaust but why would Caramel sniff onto anything that Bitssy attempted to warn her about?

Whereas Bitssy had no hard, bitter feelings toward Caramel, the same could not be said for Marmalade. That little orange imp sat as close to Caramel as the sparsely placed front wooden rickety picket fence (held together by rope and reef knots) would allow and gingerly licked the fur all over the inside of his back legs. Right in his private area! Elegance was not on the menu, but a hairball was! Yes, Marmalade, right beside Caramel's mangy head, coughed and coughed and gurgled. Caramel looked down her snout, disgustedly, at Marmalade just at the exact same moment that a slimy, stinky, stuck fur ball loosed from Marmalade’s innards and landed, fair between Caramel’s eyes.

"Why you filthy mongrel cat. I'm going to..."

"Got ya!" Down came the dogcatcher’s steel collar and stick. Click went the lock as she was reefed away from the fence and jarred into a dog cage. Terrified was Caramel. She squirmed and wiggled and tried to escape.

"Been chasing you for years, ya ugly mutt. Lucky for me that lady at 222 told me all about ya savaging her dog an’ threaten’en them kids. Figured you'd be caught off guard today, the day that all you mongrels think I'm going to put me stick up and drink left over Santa beers while I listen to the cyclone watch. Off to the pound for you now. And nobody's gonna come get you, cause you gotta be the most miserable excuse for a dog I've eva seen. Even them so called owners there in that house across the road don’t care about ya. Ugly stinkin thing, aren’t ya, under all ya pretty looks? Now get in me van. Ahhhh, ya filthy bugga. Ya peed all over me boot."
Bit 14. Caramel on Toast.

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 14. Caramel on Toast

2007-01-14T07:59:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 14, Caramel on toast

The big person stood at the front gate calling Bitssy.

"Come on girl. Ready for a walk?"

In one confident, strong leap, Bitssy cleared the side fence like a dingo on the hunt, dodged the ponging rotting limes on the ground as she ran around the side of the house, and headed straight through the gate leading to the world beyond the front yard. She sat patiently, yet excitedly, on the footpath while her big person attached a walking lead to her collar.

Marmalade had been away for over a month now, since New Year’s Eve, the longest they had been apart since they met. Although Bitssy pined for her best friend, she knew Marmalade would be fine and would not be starving to death. Marmalade wouldn't have liked to walk anyway, thought Bitssy. Walking was one of those social activities that Marmalade would avoid at all costs, unless of course there was a fat rat attached to the end of a stalking exercise!

Together Bitssy and her big person headed off down the street, stopping and chatting with children and big people alike. Whereas the humans were all talking about the newly formed cyclone in the Gulf of Carpentaria, the neighbourhood dogs all greeted Bitssy and gossiped to her about her having a dog’s life; a new year, a new freedom. Bitssy was happy, so safe, and so content that she wanted to puff up and become a butterdog floating over the world out front to ensure that all were safe from any potential dangers and cyclone threats.

As they approached the dog run park, the big person unhooked the lead and Bitssy galloped off to pursue a butterfly that she had spied on a tall tree. Just as she was leaping up to tell the butterfly that all was well with the world down here, an unfamiliar old bull dog bullied his way toward her. Without even checking if it was okay to approach, he went straight to smell Bitssy's butt. Bitssy calmly sat on the ground, looked him in the eye and said,

"No thank you, Bull. If you want to be friends you have to check with me first. This is my body, my space, and my world."

Old Bull, taken aback by Bitssy's assertiveness, snorted at her, and loped back toward his big person. Looking back over his shoulder, he thought,

"Now that's one sassy little lady. Hope my grand puppies grow up like her."

Not upset or scared by Bull’s intrusion, Bitssy wandered back to her big person. The big person was listening to the weather on her mobile phone. Bitssy looked around at the sky and found it hard to imagine that on such a fine and beautiful day there could be a cyclone anywhere near them. The big person’s hearty laugh brought Bitssy back to park reality and she looked lovingly into her big person’s face.

“Oh Bitssy,” she chuckled, scratching her behind her ear, “the cyclone was named Tropical Cyclone Caramel and the last alert has declared that Cyclone Caramel has been downgraded to a storm in a teacup that will not pose any threat to any area.”

Still laughing to herself, the big person made to go. Looking up at the sky, and around at the park, the big person mused to herself,

“Yes, all is fine with the world.”

Bitssy, encouraged by the safety message and humoured by the biting wit of calling a blow away cyclone Caramel, leaped up to place her front paws on her big person’s shoulder and swiped her hot dog’s tongue across her face.

“Yes, big person, all is well with the land and my many friends. Caramel always tasted best on toast, so let’s go home and wolf some down.”

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00 (+ p and h)

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming.

2007-01-13T09:03:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Bit 15. The Final Dreaming

Far away from Cairns, in the middle of Cape York Peninsula on a dusty, wild, Australian cattle station, Bitssy’s mother lay down in a shaded, dry, creek bed to rest. She had been out checking the fences with her Aboriginal ringer, the manager of Boundreesafe station. He hadn’t asked her to come along but he always welcomed her company. Her long years of service had meant that she could now relax and be a verandah dog: a cherished addition to the homestead. But Marnsy always ignored the privilege. She was a working dog and she loved to be out with Sam. Lagging behind, she needed to rest a little just to get her breath back. Parrots and huge black cockatoos played in the trees above her. Their coarse cries were a bush lullaby and the tired old mother soon drifted peacefully into the land of dreams.

Within her sleep space, cattle, dust and flies crept over her mind, beckoning her to awake. But she was so tired, so very tired. One more minute she thought, just one more minute’s rest.

A large grey dog stood in front of her. His eyes were like coals from the night fire, glowing and pulsating. Mother Marnsy jumped up, her tail low and her ears flat against her head. Slowly, the hairs along her back rose clearly showing her displeasure at having her space invaded. Marnsy’s growl, low, deep and long, pushed from her mouth like a mouse scurrying for cover. Her stare fixed on the huge furry grey intruder with the strange eyes. Her body told him that she was a force to be reckoned with.

The furry grey dog threw its head into the air and let go a haunting howl. The howl went on for longer than Marnsy could hold her breath and its tone reached deep into her soul to quieten and caress her lovesick spirit. Magically Marnsy settled, her early warning signs flattened down as though the wolf had poured oil onto swirling, snapping water to feed and calm it. She dropped
willingly and obediently to a waiting position in the dirt.

“A wolf,” Marnsy said aloud to herself, curious and unafraid. “A wolf in the outback. You’re out of place here. Why do you come, brother?”

The wolf ignored Marnsy’s question. He turned his back to her and howled in the direction of the sun beaten, dying, riverbed scrub. Marnsy felt duty-bound to follow the direction of the howl. Looking toward the edge of the scrub, she saw a vision. Her weary old heart jumped like a playful pup chasing a tennis ball. Her mouth, nowadays usually closed and sad, broke into a grin that slid down over her body and turned her into a young cattle pup again.

“Bitola Pride,” she whispered through smiling teeth, “my husband.”

Bitola Pride walked slowly toward his earthly wife. The strange white glow around him made him look like the shining top star of the cattle-rounding world that he was in his younger years. Unable to hold her eagerness, Marnsy galloped toward him and leapt, in a puppy fashion, eager to hug the dog she loved more than raw kangaroo meat. But she jumped straight through her heart’s desire. Marnsy, upset and showing it as anger, thought that the wolf must have been teasing her. She spun around to face him. Crouched low on the ground, growling wildly, every hair spiked as if greased, Marnsy’s body warned the wolf that she would have his testicles as souvenirs.

The wolf blinked at Marnsy and howled his disapproval at her. Not worried by the wolf’s louder and stronger howl, Marnsy prepared herself for an end-of-the-world battle.

“I will die for the memory of my loved ones,” barked Marnsy. “I will die with their names on my lips. Give me my dreams or one of us will become food for the dingoes.”

The fiery Australian sun high in the sky suddenly and magically sucked brightly into a single flare like the Olympic flame. It coached the mottled light in the dry creek bed toward it like a cockroach sprinting from a can of Mortein leaving an arena of night. The only eerie glow left to light the dusty creek bed came from Bitola Pride and the wolf.

Not scared, for she was a brave old dog, Marnsy widened her eyes and looked from one to another. Both dogs were glowing, calmly watching her. Marnsy’s mind raced. She had heard campfire stories about Min Min lights and fantastic dreamtime creations. Dreamtime stories! That was it. This was a dream that was trying to tell her something.

Marnsy stood tall and proud beside her husband. Her love for him created a glow of her own, a glow that would have been visible from outer space. After a long, loving look toward her dead husband’s ghost, she faced the wolf and her head nodded to say that she was ready to receive his message.

Images of Bitssy from a brand new pup to an older Bitssy standing up to Caramel, flashed like gold through a pan in Marnsy’s mind. The wolf showed the cattle dog couple, one of who had been savagely killed before Bitssy was even born, that the pup had developed into a strong, safe and sensible dingo who was succeeding in her city life. A dingo who could recognize her own body as a sacred space that deserved protection. A dingo who would lead the way by showing others that speaking up and body ownership are important issues. A dingo who allowed her own wolf voice to show her how to flush out the prized catch of freedom: body ownership that no one else had the right to interfere with. A dingo who listened to the voice of her dreams and found the howl that needed to be heard. A dingo who stepped through the door of fear and was greeted with a mat of acceptance and support, not only from wolves but from the big people around her too. A dingo whosedreaming had saved her life.

Marnsy’s heart was as light and fluffy as a freshly washed puppy. She knew her Bitssy would go far. Her special pup, sadly born of a violent encounter with Australia’s feral killing machine, was a dingo out of place in an unfamiliar world. She knew that if Bitssy had a chance to go to the city that the obvious looking inbuilt dingo killing genes would be refocused to a useful purpose. She would become more like the father that she should have had.

“I have done the right thing,” Marnsy said to the wolf and Bitola Pride. “I have missed my baby, but she is an Indigenous leader, a link between the dreaming of the Cape and the violence of the city. My Bitssy has shown that plenty of space can be found wherever she goes. She will carry the wide-open country of her homeland in her heart and let it shine through her body. It is her dreaming to fit big space into her body space.”

Bitola Pride looked lovingly to his wife as he settled down to peace, in the earthy, familiar, country of his youth. Marnsy joined him in the dust and closed her eyes to savour a final dreaming with him.

Whistling for Marnsy to come, Sam Boundreesafe began to wonder where she had run off to.

“That old dog one good tracker,” he laughed to himself. “She gonna round up dem clean skins probly an bring em to me. I bin thinking that she be real manager of all this country. That dog got one good nose for seeing. She like a spirit dog. Good medicine dog. I gunna give my dog sum dry tucker and tell her she good. Real good dog, like my best mate.”

Deciding to have some tucker himself before checking out the front fences, Sam headed his horse toward the creek bed to boil the billy. Entering through a well-worn cattle path, he came face to face with Marnsy’s body lying stiff in the bull dust. Her earthly form had been invaded by thousands of meat ants, hungrily searching out breaks in her skin to begin their carnivorous assault. Flies were swarming her face and crawling into crevices and holes that now stared blankly ahead, unmoving and unaffected by the harshness of the bush food chain.

Sam jumped from his horse and ran to help her. While checking her body for snakebite, the grief began to tremble in his hands, shoulders and legs. To the silent wild life watching mournfully from behind, it looked as though he was shaking Marnsy awake. The rousing dingoes, sensing something was wrong, sniffed forward toward the creek bed scrub. Hiding behind the trees they noiselessly watched Sam, sitting cross-legged in the dirt, rocking Marnsy in his arms and wailing an Aboriginal corroboree song to help Marnsy’s spirit find her dreaming ancestors. The wild native dogs smelt Sam’s tears and knew that Marnsy was dead.

In a single dingo chorus of respect, a howl covered the wide-open space like an envelope over a sympathy card. The howling message stick sounded deep in the hearts of every human and animal body within the fences of Boundreesafe station. The knowing settled over them like a cape of dreaming. A special dreaming that would be worn to remind future generations about body boundaries and inner wolf strength. Marnsy’s life, and death, had given them all the gift of knowing.

Eulogy.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00.

Eulogy (last chapter of Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast)

2007-01-12T08:00:00.000+10:00

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

Eulogy
n. a formal expression of praise
WordNet (R) 2.0, (C) 2003
Princeton University

WARNING WARNING: This is the uncut eulogy to the tomcat’s riddles and to the Bitssy and Marnsy learning. This eulogy is M15+. If you could not stand the sight of Caramel toilet sausages, or you cried alone at Marnsy’s death, DO NOT read on. You may be too sensitive to receive the dreaming: not ready to take your place beside Bitssy in the Dog’s Body Army.

Marmalade may have appeared to be an innocent, yet daringly cheeky, tomcat. Don’t be fooled. Marmalade was, and remains, that great blob of fat that WILL block your veins and demand your attention to speaking up when things are making you sick! The situation that he and Bitssy found themselves in deserves your full anger, your immediate attention to changing your life if a Caramel person won’t let you onto your own front verandah. Marmalade’s riddily catastrophes are the key to flushing that smelly bowl that may have bits of left over Caramel toilet sausages floating in your toilet! Too scared to go there for fear of vomiting and running away in terror, you will not just flush it away, you will hold, hold, hold, until you explode! Oh, no! Not good. You have to do something different now!

Did you know that far too many children are not allowed to have their own private body space? Caramel monsters, who often look sweet and just like everybody else, control and hurt them. The monsters invade their body space and trick everyone around into thinking that they are sweet and wonderful. Some of those monsters even touch the children’s private parts (the parts covered by swimming costumes like Cindy and Matty had on) and tell them that it’s okay. Before you ever get into this situation, remember what Bitssy had to slowly learn from Marmalade: my body, my home, my space, my privacy! If it does happen to you, it is not your fault. Remember what Bitssy said: “This is my body and I will take it where I want without fear of you, or anyone else hurting me. I will tell, and my big person will help me.” In our human world it is an adult’s job to protect children so it is never, ever, your fault.

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast is about body ownership. It is the first in a
series of five books about keeping yourself safe. In this story Marmalade teaches Bitssy about boundaries and speaking up. While this book may give you some ideas, you need to practise doing things differently, and never lose sight of your dreams. Remember that your body belongs to YOU! You have the right to take it safely wherever you want without fear of anyone hurting you. If someone does hurt you, do a Bitssy: tell someone!

So what else did Bitssy learn from Marmalade? He was such a tricky little devil and his riddles in Bit 4 made me want to stamp my foot and demand an answer to foreboding catastrophes NOW!

Because I’m the author, I can cheat and tell you what Bitssy learnt. So listen up everybody, here we go:

Catastrophe 1: Talk up will you, your bark is much worse than your bite, it just
doesn’t exist! Marmalade was trying to get Bitssy to understand that she was keeping her thoughts and her fears to herself instead of shaking them out and facing them, dog to dog. When you keep fearful thoughts inside your head they become scarier, jumbled and stuck: stinkin’ thinking!

Whereas dingoes can bite, they cannot bark. Marmalade had to find a different way to make her point about telling. By throwing Bitssy a riddle about dingo
barking, Marmalade was sure that Bitssy would think about trying to solve it. Bitssy did! She found her hidden howl, and developed the courage to tell Caramel to stop, to leave her alone. She made it clear to Caramel that she would tell. Well done Bitssy, you’re the best. I want to be like you when I grow up.

Catastrophe 2: Learn to recognise a reef knot. It’s a strong boundary knot that will help to pull you, and me, out of trouble. Ahh, wise Marmalade. He used one of the seven great wonders of the natural world, the Great Barrier Reef, to help to teach Bitssy about barriers and boundaries. Bitssy lived in Cairns, a beautiful place in Australia right on the Great Barrier Reef. Marmalade knew that Bitssy would understand that the reef acted like a safety knot of coral, protecting fish and other sea creatures from danger.

Like the Great Barrier Reef, fences, maps, and globes show that every house/suburb/state/country has a boundary. The boundary shows the body of the country. Most of these countries have armies that help to protect the boundary. Our fences and clothes are like an army. They help to protect our yard and our body and give a sign to people that certain parts are private – the parts inside the fence and the body parts covered by our underwear or swimming costumes.

Bitssy, once she was brave enough to play in her front yard, saw that the fence was held up by a series of reef knots. This made Bitssy think about the idea of safe space: a space that had a barrier around it, a boundary that other people cannot cross without being invited. Thinking back to the riddle and other Marmalade stories about fences, clothes, and farmers’ trucks, Bitssy got it!

Bitssy got that she had to learn how to recognize not only danger, but also things that would help her to be safe and pull her free from things that may harm her. Reef knots are used to tie two different sized ropes together. It would make sense then to use two different ways of getting help. Bitssy chose to use her mouth to tell, and her support people to help interrupt and stop the danger. Pretty smart, hey! Bitssy’s Dog’s Body Army didn’t stop telling. They made sure that as many dogs as possible knew what the situation was. People can keep telling too, until somebody helps. How did Bitssy say it?: “I will tell.”

Catastrophe 3: Being scared doesn’t stop you from doing things, you just have to do them differently. Although nobody knew, Marmalade was scared of Caramel too. Marmalade was determined, though, that he would not have a bully control his movements and stop him from enjoying his life. Remember when Marmalade jumped into the farmer’s truck? The alarm went off and scared another life out of Marmalade. He even ran away from the treasured rat he was hunting! From that one experience, Marmalade learned that there was more than one way to catch a rat. He just had to do it differently without interfering in anybody else’s rights.

Everyone feels scared at some time. It is a normal feeling, an early warning sign to tell us to pay attention because something is not right. What most people do is think about whether their fear is real or imagined. They sort it in their head and find someone to help them. Fear was controlling Bitssy’s movements though. It froze her brain and kept her chained to the same spot. It was ruining her life. She had failed to recognise fear as an early warning sign that could lead to help and instead allowed it to stop her from doing what she had the right to do.

By suggesting to Bitssy that there were different ways to do things, Marmalade threw Bitssy a bone to chew on. Bitssy began to try different things, to tell herself that she was ready to be more wolf like. She learnt that the wolf inside her dreams was really a part of her: her power and her help. Although it took some time, Bitssy was able to make a thinking shift in her mind that allowed her to break free of the heavy fear that was squashing her, and instead face it square on. Bitssy stopped being so bone headed! A strange dream of a dog from another country (a wolf) seemed out of place to her. She was an Australian dingo. She was different. That’s it! She would be different from now on.

Doing things differently always seems strange at first. Speaking up about things can be as hard as learning a different language. But Bitssy stuck with doing things differently and she won in the end. Congratulations Bitssy. You deserve another Private stripe as a reward. Ohh, but two stripes makes a corporal. Private Bitssy is moving up the ranks of success.

Catastrophe 4: Dream aplenty so that Catman-do and din-go anywhere they want. Ahhhh, the dreams. Dreams are wonderful. Dreams are our body-mind’s way of working things out. Some people don’t listen to their dreams and they miss out on learning some really helpful information. We all have wolf like messengers inside us. Bitssy’s wolves kept coming back until she finally realised that the wolves were part of her. They were her body’s way of telling her that it was time to be different, time to listen to her inner voice and to growl back at monsters, real or imagined ones.

With the help of her dreams, Bitssy and Marmalade got to play together in the front yard. The nightmare struggle was worth it. Bitssy took that dream power from inside and her life became a living dream: a dream of checking that all was well with the land and her many friends.

The wolf and the wolverine, the dream picture of the reef, the water wolf, the fear eating goannas and the sharks and crocodiles were all part of Bitssy’s inner strength desperately trying to fight her fear. Because Bitssy was ignoring her strength in her waking hours, her strength had to visit her in dreams and give her hints about what she could do. The pack of wolves, loosed from her throat and snapping the world to attention, was Bitssy speaking up, taking back her power and speaking out about wrong.

Marmalade had been watching Bitssy for weeks before he was bold enough to drop into her garden. Marmalade needed to be sure that Bitssy was a kind dog, not a dog that would eat cats. Hidden in the orange shrubs, Marmalade would watch Bitssy play and sleep. He knew that Bitssy dreamt because he would often see her legs jiggling like she was chasing a butterfly.

Marmalade felt sorry for Bitssy, jailed to the back yard, and saw that Bitssy needed some assistance to make her go-anywhere-to-check-the-world-is-safe dream come to life. Marmalade was so lonely after his years of wandering homelessness that he really wanted to be friends with Bitssy and play with her in the front yard, as well as the back. Marmalade knew that he would enter the front yard (Cat-man-do) and he so wanted to encourage Bitssy to join him there and wherever else (Din-go) they decided to investigate. By putting together a riddle about dreaming and doing, Marmalade knew that Bitssy would eventually make her dreams reality and start acting as though she was a go-anywhere-I-want-safely dog (Din-go).

The visiting grey dream wolf at Marnsy’s deathbed showed her that Bitssy had learned wonderful lessons and was now truly free. The dreams were part of Marnsy’s inner wish to make sure that all was well. Marnsy wouldn’t die until she knew that her Bitssy was safe and really had become special. Recognising her own inner needs in a dream, Marnsy died happy and content. Sad, yes, but now Marnsy was free too. Her baby had not developed a dingo’s need to senselessly kill, and her husband was waiting for her. This is what Marnsy wanted: peace.

The pictures from Marnsy’s death and Bitssy’s life have given us different meaning to dreams. Dreams of wolves will no longer be scary. They will be understood as messengers of personal power and strength, passed from one person to another, to allow everybody the right to go where they want without fear of being controlled by Caramel monsters. And Caramel monsters? Well, let’s just say that anybody who tries to invade your body space deserves to end up in the pound with Caramel. Bitssy is still around, spreading the message, telling her story about dreaming, speaking up and taking back the power. If there’s anyone out there who’s planning a Caramel take over, be warned. Bitssy’s told the world to tell: to not fall for your sugary lies. And tell we will. We want sweet dreams, not diabetic comas!

Bitssy, we salute you.

To purchase Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast please visit this eBay store: Duncan's Emporium Gifts and Curios. They are selling the book at only A$12.00 plus postage. RRP is $15.00.

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast: A Chapter Each Day

2007-01-11T15:06:00.000+10:00

Self help books and books for children that can be used as bibliotherapy have been on my mind since writing Can Any Children’s Book Provide Advice? Although I set out the steps for using any book as bibliotherapy in “Are children’s books providing them with enough advice?” I appreciate that some parent’s will still be cautious about choosing a book to help educate around child sexual abuse prevention.

Therefore, I have decided to publish a chapter from “Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast” each day until the whole book is published on this blog. "Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast" is for teaching children, and adults, about Body Ownership. Body Ownership is the first element of personal safety in the BITSS model of Protective Behaviours.

Chapters begin (in reverse order) tomorrow. I’ll post every day, including over the weekend. In 17 days you will have the entire book to read to your children to help them develop skills of child sexual assault prevention.

If you would like to purchase a hard copy of the book, contact me through Child Protection: Serious Business or you can buy directly from St Luke’s Innovative Resources.

Happy Reading and imaginif…play protected our kids.

Can Any Children’s Book Provide Advice?

2007-01-09T15:21:00.000+10:00

Yes. The process of providing advice through books, any book on your bookcase, is called bibliotherapy. While expensive self-help books, with structured steps for life improvement, are a form of adult bibliotherapy, quality junior fiction offers a range of problem solving options for our children.

The advice contained within children's literature is only as good as the parental involvement of structuring follow up activities toward integration of the child's need for advice or social information. This need could centre on sexual abuse protection, bullying, fear, temper tantrums, disabilities or any other concern of children.

To turn children’s fiction into helpful learning, follow the nine easy steps of bibliotherapy.

You don’t have to buy self help books – you’ve already got them.

What book are you reading your child today?

Chatterbox Play: A Touching Experience.

2007-01-08T11:06:00.000+10:00

The concept of good touch/bad touch can be difficult to explain to children.

Here’s two more play ideas to weave into everyday protective play.

Chatterbox: Make a chatterbox out of a square piece of paper (for instructions, click here). Most children know how to make one so ask the experts for assistance here! On the inside faces, include statements about good touch/bad touch. Children love a bit of rot so don’t make it all serious. Put something like, “You cuddled a koala and it pooped on you. / Boo Hoo, Poo Poo”. The aim is to get it into the child’s head that sometimes, good things turn to bad things and that it is okay to react when this happens.

Miming: When the children are bored and ask you what they can do, as a fun alternative to suggesting they clean their rooms, play a miming game, similar to Charades. Mime out a good touch that turns to a bad touch and then mime going to tell someone what has happened. The good touch/bad touch mime does not need to be around abuse. It could be greet kissing a friend who has very bad breath and the kiss turns into a breath holding session. If you choose to mime a cuddle that turns to a sexual touch please follow it up with a discussion about body ownership and the importance of telling someone what has happened.

If you would like to know more about Protective Behaviours and the BITTS model of Protective Play, click here.

If you have some protective play ideas, I'd love to hear them. Don't be shy, share them and help children and families all over the world.

My Space – A Protective Barrier.

2007-01-07T07:59:00.000+10:00

Looking for some simple discussion ideas to begin talking about the importance of Body Ownership? Here are three discussion starters suitable for all ages. The sooner you introduce the BITSS way of protecting children from sexual abuse, the better protective play will work. Children are never too young, or too old, to have protective behaviours reinforced.

Fences, windows and doors: Explain to children that the reason we have fences, windows or doors is to give a message of defensible space: space that belongs to us and says “Private. No entry”. That is why we shut the toilet door when we go to the toilet! Sand play is a great way to reinforce defensible space. When your child builds a sand castle tell them that strong walls and moats were a castle’s protection and that a sun hat and sun cream are the child’s protection now, just like wearing swimming costumes to protect private parts.

Atlas/Globe: Using maps or a globe show that every state/suburb/country has a boundary. The boundary shows the body of the country. Most of these countries have armies that help to protect the boundary. Our clothes are like an army. They help to protect our body and give a sign to other people that certain parts of our body are private – the parts we wear underwear or swimming costumes over.

The Great Barrier Reef: One of the seven natural wonders of the world, the Great Barrier Reef is a nature given protective behaviour barrier. The reef acts like a safe house, giving protection to millions of different marine life. The reef has many predators too and different species of marine life have adapted protective behaviours to escape the hungry jaws of predators. Nature gave us brains and mouths – these are our protective ways to escape from dangerous predators. If someone is doing something to you that makes you feel like a jellyfish, it is okay to sting them by using your mouth and telling someone. Make your body a Great Barrier Reef, a special place that is protected by laws that say, you cannot touch the fish, coral or shells on this reef.

Game Rules of Touch

2007-01-05T16:27:00.000+10:00

In Good Touch Bad Touch we saw how sexual predators use everyday touch to trick, confuse and desensitize children. Flowers and animal activities were suggested as easy ways to help your children learn the sneakiness between good touch turning into bad touch.

Here’s another two super easy protective play ideas to weave into your everyday life. Remember that the more you protectively play, the better the chance that your child will not be hurt by those horrible people that try to trick them with touch.

Rule poster: Make up a poster collage that depicts good touches that turn to bad touches. Even an ice cream on a hot day leading up to a melted ice cream and a sad child is a great example of good touch to bad touch and is something that most children would be able to identify with. Draw a big red line through the middle of the collage, through the behaviours that are beginning to become suspicious, and tell your children that it is at this point that they must tell the person that they are going to tell on them. This is not tittle-tattling or dobbing. This is you protecting your children against the possibility of sexual abuse.

Traffic Lights: When teaching children colours many parents use some sort of reward system for when the child gets the colour right. If you show behaviours as traffic lights, where green is good touch, orange is suspicious or iffy “I’m going to tell” touch, and red is “No way! I’m telling now” touch, it is easy for them to remember that behaviours can change from go to stop. Reward your child for correct guessing of behaviours. A sticker, or a story, is better than a food reward as food and good nutrition is a child’s right, not a treat.

Related articles:
Understanding Protective Behaviors in keeping Children Safe
BITSS of Touch

Intuition and Early Warning Sign Activities

2007-01-04T10:05:00.000+10:00

Intuition is the funny body feelings (early warning signs) that we all get at different times. Sometimes intuition is nothing more than our fears taking over our body and thoughts but often intuition is our body screaming at us to listen to what is really happening around us.

Intuition needs to be clearly taught to our children. Far too often, I have heard children and women say, after the fact, “If only I’d listened to my intuition.”

Here’s two simple art activities I use with children in therapy to help them understand what their early warning signs are. Recognizing and acting on early warning signs is a way to prevent our children from being sexually abused. These therapeutic activities can be easily blended into your every day play with your children. Protective Play is the most unobtrusive way to keep our kids safe.

Drawing/writing exercise using prompt pictures: Show your child a picture from a magazine, photo, or card. Ask them to draw/write the way their body would react to the situation in the picture. When, and if, children respond by saying they would punch/kiss the person, trust them because they look nice or run away, ask them to draw/write what would be happening inside their body where nobody else can see. This process is a bit like peeling an onion. There are layers to get through to help connect with body reactions, emotional layers that are deeper than the behaviours children show us.

Art collage of different faces: Cut faces out of magazines and glue to a sheet of paper. Ask the child to say how they think each person is feeling. Learning emotional language will help your child throughout life. When they can express emotions, children have a better chance of telling you if something happens to them. Because children don’t have an extended emotional vocabulary they act out their emotions as a way of telling us something is wrong. As parents, we often miss these messages, and ask the child to stop being naughty/silly/annoying. If your child cannot find words to express their emotions, they have body stances. Mix the pieces up and have the child match them together. While the child is matching, give hints about what a person’s legs might look like if they’ve got an angry face and have their arms crossed, or what a face might look like when the arms and legs are hanging limp.

Can you imagine yourself doing this with your kids? What other things do you do to teach intuition (early warning signs) to your kids?

My favorite book for teaching about Intuition is: Jelly Legs by Colin Varney.

Other activities to protectively play around intuition and early warning signs:

A Mime of Early Warning Information
Game to Develop Emotional Intelligence.
.

Body Ownership Games and Activities for Protective Behaviours

2007-01-02T09:04:00.000+10:00

Body Ownership is an important Protective Behaviour concept to teach your children. When children are trained to understand that their body is theirs and that nobody can touch it if the child does not want them to, our children have greater protection against sexual predators zeroing in on them.

Protective Play makes personal safety training super easy. Here’s two activity ideas to reinforce the protective behaviour element of Body Ownership.

Body outlines: As an activity to display different body size, have your child stand against a big piece of paper with their legs together (Stick the paper to the wall to do this exercise, don’t have it on the ground because a lying down position places a child in a vulnerable position). Draw around the child’s body. Then have the child draw around yours and compare sizes. Stick the body outlines to the wall as a way of visually displaying the difference in size between an adult and a child. Tell the child that it is an adult’s job to look after children because adults are bigger and can do more things. WARNING – never draw around a child’s genital area. Children who have experienced sexual abuse may interpret this as a sexual behaviour and become confused about it. Also, perpetrators may use this exercise as a way to desensitize children against having their private parts touched or looked at.

Photo collages: Using pictures cut from magazines, make a people collage. Talk about the difference in size between adults and children and stress that adults look after children, not hurt them or do adult type things with them (like making them do all the housework or kissing like Mum and Dad).

Related art activity blog on Body Ownership: Protective Behaviour Decorations for Christmas.

Does anybody have any other Body Ownership game ideas that I can pass on to parents who are concerned with keeping their children safe from sexual abuse? Sharing ideas helps others and lessens the isolation experienced by families whose children have been sexually abused.

BITSS of New Year Resolutions: Imaginif there was a World Without Child Sexual Abuse!

2007-01-01T13:18:00.000+10:00

Imaginif there was a world without child sexual abuse.

Imaginif 2007 was the year where you decided to provide your child with awareness and skills around what to do if someone tries to sexually abuse your child.

Imaginif “Happy New Year” meant just that for all of our children.

The BITSS model of Protective Behaviours provides you with a structure to protectively play around the important safety BITSS of:

Body Ownership
Intuition
Touch
Say no, and
Support Networks

Matching games and activities around each of these five important protective behaviour BITSS is easy, educational and can help to keep kids safe. Just click on the links for some jam packed ideas of spreading BITSS of child safety across the globe.

Still deciding on a New Years Resolution? Make it a protective resolution. Do your BITSS to Protect your child, my child, our children.

Support 2007 Children to Have a Happy New Year. It’s easy, if you’re up for a BITT of a challenge.

Recognition of the BITSS model of Protective Behaviours from the Australian Centre for the Study of Sexual Assault:
Good Practice Programs, BITSS of Protective Play - A skill based workshop for family and child workers

Gone Protective Playing for a Few Days.

2006-12-28T08:57:00.000+10:00

We're away for a few days. We are heading off to Townsville for a bit of Protective Play. We will be back on New Years Eve.

Stay Safe while we are away and you are enjoying your holiday break.

See you soon. Megan and Jade.

Private Parts: What to call them?

2006-12-27T08:18:00.000+10:00

Give your children the best protection from sexual predators by talking about bodies: all parts of the body, even the private parts.

If children grow up knowing that private body part talk is not allowed then they may not tell you if someone does touch their private parts. Using made up names for private parts signals that it is rude to call private parts by their correct terminology. This needs to change so that children know that this is not a rude subject but that the person who touched them is rude and a law breaker.

Our children need to know that they are allowed to tell us that someone touched their vagina, penis, anus or breast.

Use the following two game ideas to introduce using private part talk:

Swimming costumes: Use dressing or swimming time to introduce private parts. The parts that our swimmers or undies cover are private parts of our body that we don’t share with other people. They are ours and nobody can touch them. Exceptions are parents washing and health workers checking. When children say, “What will I draw?” respond “How about a picture of you in your swimmers? Remember to cover your private parts, and don’t forget a hat”.

A word a week: Correct names of body parts: Many parents are uncomfortable with using the correct name for body parts. To provide your child with the best protection, they need to know the correct or “language” name for their private areas and require instruction from you that nobody can touch them in those places unless Mum or Dad are washing them or unless they are sick and the doctor or nurse needs to look there. It can be hard to introduce the correct names if you have been using nicknames since the child was born. Overcome this by introducing a game of “A word a week”. By teaching a new word a week, say “partition”, or “adventurous” you are normalising the introduction of words of the week like vagina, penis, anus, and breasts.

Does your family use correct terminology for private parts or do you have made up names?

BITSS of Christmas

2006-12-24T13:55:00.000+10:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS

to each and every one of you. Our best wishes for a peaceful and safe Christmas. To read our wish for 2007, have a look at Megan's Christmas message @ imaginifbusiness: click here.

We're away until early January - camping with the family. Thank you to our readers, supporters and family.

Imaginif...there was a Christmas without child sexual abuse.

Megan and Jade

Game to Develop Emotional Intelligence.

2006-12-16T05:52:00.000+10:00

In a Mime of Early Warning Information, I looked at developing emotional language and intelligence to help children uncover their feelings. I provided two game activities to use to get kids playing and talking about their early warning signs. Here’s another two ideas.

Scary stories or movies: Scary stories are a great way to introduce physical early warning signs. When reading a story together you can ask your child how their body is feeling. If they respond that they don’t know, reflect to them what their body is doing: curled up in a ball, fists clenched, sweating, chewing fingernails, etc.

Common physical descriptions from children: In my work with children I have heard many early warning signs. These include:

A pack of wolves in my tummy.
A ball of string with lots of knots in it.
Fire or skull and crossbones in my stomach.
A question sign/bell in my head.
Beautiful smelling flowers in my heart.
Ants biting me all over.
Legs like Mummy’s tummy, all wobbly.
An echidna in my chest.

Use some of these or invent your own when you discuss feelings with your child. By modeling a verbal description of how your body is feeling linked to the emotional word you would use, you are assisting your child to gain a greater feeling vocabulary. Use a variety of physical descriptions to match a whole range of emotions, not just scared or angry feelings. Remember the good feelings too. How would you describe the body feelings for happiness, relief and excitement? Describing feelings is not just about the painful feelings. All feelings are natural and are there to tell us something.

Give your Child a Hand this Christmas Holiday

2006-12-15T08:59:00.000+10:00

Give your child a hand this Christmas holiday, teach them about support networks.

When adults are stressed they often forget things, like telephone numbers or birth dates and we reach out to our other adult friends/mates to help us remember. When children become stressed they also forget things. Their mind is so busy attempting to work out what is happening there is little memory room left for remembering. Both adults and children need a memory aid to assist remembering things – like a telephone or birthday book. Children can’t carry heavy books all the time so, over this Christmas holiday break, show your children how to use their hand as a memory aid.

Use the symbol of a hand to encourage having five support people that a child can contact at any time. It could be Mum, Dad, Teacher, Grandma, Aunty. The list of possibilities is endless. The idea is to ensure that your child remembers they can talk to these people about anything at all. In situations where you just don’t know enough trusted people, use the names of services like Kids Help Line or Police.

This needs to be continually reinforced so that when your child is feeling stressed about something, particularly if it is sexual abuse, they can look at their hand and remember what to do: to call and tell someone. Tell your child that if the first support person is not available, go to the next, or the next. Encourage children to keep telling until someone does something to help and protect them.

The Support Hand activity: Trace the child’s hand. On each of the fingers have the child write the name and telephone number of their five chosen support people. It’s best to tell the people they’ve been chosen so that if your child rings they will listen and do something. Stick the hand to a wall where the child will continually see it, and practise, practice, practice remembering who to tell if they need to talk about anything.

Another fun activity for reinforcing the BITSS element of Support Networks: Walkie Talkies.

Related article on BITSS of Support Networks: Click here. This article includes some other activities that you can use to reinforce the idea of having a support network to talk to.

FREE Copy of the Junior Fiction Protective Behaviour Book: Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast

2006-12-14T08:22:00.000+10:00

Three FREE copies of my Children’s junior fiction chapter book on Protective Behaviours: Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast.

The first three people to leave a comment on this blog over the next 24 hours will receive a copy of the book.

No matter where you live in the world, I will send you a FREE copy with FREE postage included.

Once three comments have been registered I will post my email address and you can email me your address to post you the book. Please don't put your email address in the comment field. Who wants to be spammed up by Christmas Trolls?

Addresses will be used for no other purpose than sending you a complimentary copy of Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast.

What a great Christmas present to help keep kids safe.

The clock is ticking. This free offer lasts for 24 hours from time of posting this blog.

To read a related article on using Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast as Bibliotherapy, Click here.

Protective Behaviour Decorations for Christmas

2006-12-13T11:51:00.000+10:00

Christmas is upon us. This joyful and peaceful time can be a horror season for a child who is being accessed by a sexual predator. Close proximity, a string of holidays and higher alcohol intake can lead to many children experiencing more sexual abuse at this time of the year than at any other time.

With this in mind, I take the opportunity to reinforce Body Ownership with every child who comes through my counselling room and with my own four children.

Here are two simple and cost effective ideas you can introduce this Christmas season to reinforce the protective behaviour element of body ownership.

Paper doll chains: Instead of the usual paper strips joined to make delightful circle chains, make a paper doll chain with your child. As part of the protective learning while making the Christmas chain, show how the dolls are holding hands or touching feet but not touching any other body parts. This is because some dolls and people don’t like being touched and we must respect that. Sometimes we don’t like being touched and we can use our words to tell, but dolls don’t have words so they have to tell us by allowing touching hands only.

Gingerbread person: Using a gingerbread person cutter you can show your child the out line of the gingerbread body. Explain that every person has their own body outline and that each of us is different. Our body outline is our boundary and protector. Nobody can touch us if we don’t want them to. We have a set of Gingerbread family: a male, female, girl and boy gingerbread cutters. I talk about the different sizes of people and how it is also an adults responsibility to protect children, not hurt them in any way.

From the moment we are born our bodies belong to us. They are our human signature. Babies may need to rely on adults to care for them but each baby’s body is still unique: unique skin, tone, imprints, hair, voice, size and shape.

A newborn baby has little realisation of where their body begins and ends, so as loving parents we engage in touch, good touch, to teach our babies what is theirs and what is ours. We stroke them, massage them and put clothes on them to give a message of body ownership.

Children who are at risk of sexual abuse, or who have already been sexually assaulted often don’t have a good idea of their body size or where their body boundaries begin and end. Too frequently they fail to recognise their real size in relation to a potential perpetrator. Sometimes they think they are as big as the perpetrator and sometimes they see themselves as much smaller and helpless than everybody else in their family. This size confusion is a result of lowered self-esteem and something that perpetrators may focus on in their grooming process. For this reason it is important to teach our children body ownership and to assist in ensuring they have a healthy self-esteem.

Can you share any other home-made Christmas decoration ideas that would be helpful in keeping children safe from sexual abuse?

A Mime of Early Warning Information.

2006-11-27T14:47:00.000+10:00

Intuition is the grown up, fancy name for feelings in our body and heart. Our intuition is what starts our Early Warning Signs: physical sensations in our body that tell us that not all is okay. To protect ourselves from getting hurt, it is important that we listen to our early warning signs and remove ourselves from risky situations when they arise.

There are over 2000 feelings words in our vocabulary but typically, any of us will only use six words to describe our feelings. To give kids the best possible chance or recognizing and responding to sexually exploitive situations it is very important to teach them about feelings.

Here is a really easy activity to play with your children to help them develop new feeling words to attach to their body feelings – their early warning signs.

Mime: When the opportunity arises and the kids are bored with nothing to do, play a miming game. Silently act out a particular body reaction to any emotion and ask the children to guess what you are feeling. Offer a prize for correct answers. Gingerbread people make great food prizes because you can then naturally mention body ownership.

Remember though that food is a child’s right and food rewards do not replace good care and nutrition. A food reward needs to be something special: A real treat, not something that your child has a basic right to on a daily basis.

For more free game and activity ideas to do with Intuition and Early Warning signs have a look at BITSS of Intuition.

Let me know about how your Mime of Early Warning information went.

Good Touch Bad Touch

2006-11-24T08:30:00.000+10:00

Teaching through play works. Work is children’s play: their business. Business needs reinforcing on a daily basis or business begins to fail. So too with the business of protective play, reinforce the protection by playing everyday with the five important elements of the BITSS model of Protective Behaviours – Body Ownership, Intuition, Touch, Say no, and Support network.

Touch is a difficult area to play protectively with if you do not understand the subtle difference between good touch/bad touch. Child sexual predators use normal touch (good touch) to desensitize a child and move them toward accepting bad touch. It happens gradually and sometimes without the child even realizing what has happened. If someone pats your child’s shoulder in friendship, it may be acceptable. If that same someone tomorrow pats your child’s breast and claims it was a mistake, it is a warning sign that they are moving toward bad touch and that your child is allowed to react, to come and tell you.

Our natural environment is useful for teaching about good touch/bad touch. When we look at the early warning signs in nature, we have a better understanding of how early warning signs work inside of our body and how a situation can very quickly move from being good to being awful. Many nature based activities can be designed around the below two discussion starting points.

Flowers: As beautiful as some flowers may be, they have the potential to turn from a good touch to a bad touch. Use them as an example. Running up to smell a beautiful flower may result in being pricked by a thorn, stung by a bee, or getting a rash on your face from poison leaves or petals. Some people too can be tricky. They start off being nice but it's a trick. They end up hurting us with their words or touch. When the good touch turns to bad touch it is okay to come and tell someone.

Animals: Many parents warn children about patting dogs, “Be careful! That dog might bite”. This is a perfect example of good touch/bad touch. Use these teachable moments to explain that sometimes, good things can turn to bad things and that children need to watch for changes and know when to back away. If you are patting a cat and its tail starts flicking it is the cat’s early warning sign to us that it is unhappy. Your child is at risk of being bitten or scratched by the cat. People have signs in their behavior too. When people move to bad touch, back away from them and tell someone what has happened.

Can you share a game idea that you use to teach about good touch/bad touch? The more we share, the quicker all of our children stay safe.

Say No to Hang Man.

2006-11-23T11:22:00.001+10:00

Helping children say “no” to predatory adults is important. When a sexual predator attempts to convince your child that the behavior is acceptable, your child needs to know that there are situations where they can say “no” to an adult.

Despite many toddlers starting their vocal repertoire with the word “no”, we soon let them know that it’s not nice to say “no” to grownups. Umm…it is not nice that some grownups sexually abuse our children. Our children need to practice saying “no” so that when they really need to say it, they already know they can do it.

Play the following practice game to help your child understand that it is okay to say “no” in some situations:

Don’t hang the person: This game is a variation of the world favorite “Hang Man”. Pick a longish statement that both fits your child’s situation, and incorporates them being able to say “no”. For example, “When someone wants you to be low, you can turn around and tell them “no”!” It is important to pick a long statement with lots of different letters because you do not want your child to end up hanged. Make this impossible to happen. For the example statement, you would draw the spaces up as:
- - - - / - - - - - - - / - - - - - / - - - / - - / - - / - - -, / - - - / - - - / - - - - / - - - - - - / - - - / - - - - / - - - - / “- -!”.

As your child says a letter from the alphabet, you write it in the appropriate space. If the child picks a letter that is not contained in the statement, one part of the hangman stand with dangling stick body is drawn.

This game can include statements to fit any of the BITSS pieces. I always follow the statement up by asking the child how they will say “no” to someone bigger than them or in a position of power. I do this to help cement the ability to say “no” and to increase the child’s confidence that there are some things that big people just cannot do, no matter how much authority they have.

For further free games, activities and ideas on how to help your child say "no", click here.

What are your thoughts on helping your child practice saying “no”?

Walkie Talkies: Support Networks.

2006-11-22T18:40:00.000+10:00

In protective behaviour speak, Walkie Talkies are our feet. Each foot has five toes representing a person we can walk and talk to if something feels yucky inside us. The “yucky” might be a sick feeling because we ate too many lollies or it might be a “yucky” feeling about someone else or maybe even something “yucky” they did to us. Two walkie talkies makes for a solid platform of ten people we can walk and talk to if we have to.

Most people will be aware of the symbol of a hand as a visual reminder of a support network. Each finger represents a safe person that we can talk to about anything. Feet are a variation of the hand and offer some different activities for encouraging children to remember their support people.

In BITSS of Support Networks, I have set out two simple art activities that you can use to encourage your child to walk and talk to people who can help them.

Have fun with your walkie talkies and remember: Nothing is so awful we can't talk to someone about it.

Children’s story books + an activity = BIBLIOTHERAPY

2006-11-20T22:35:00.000+10:00

Books can provide protective ideas and guidance to children. When the reading of a book combines with a follow up activity based in the books message, it becomes bibliotherapy.

Self-help books, with structured steps for life improvement, are a form of adult bibliotherapy. However, quality junior fiction is just as effective for children in offering a range of problem solving options. The advice contained within children's literature though, is only as good as the parental help in follow up activities toward integration of whatever the child’s need is.

Children learn through play. Reading is play and a preferred indoor play option for many families. The initial play and problem solving value of reading occurs as children engage with the book's characters. Connected with the story, the child enters an imaginary space of interactive problem solving. Aided by the struggles and achievements of the characters, children learn the social rules of behavior and develop different ways of being able to seek help or reflecting on life issues. If provided with real life opportunities to test literature-induced problem solving, the child is active in their own therapy and the book becomes a good tool for providing advice.

There are three purposes of using children's books as therapy:

1. Identification of character and social situation: This identification increases the probability of learning different behaviors and receiving advice.

2. Catharsis: Through identification, an emotional connection with the character or social situation allows children to act out and discuss their emotional responses to the situation.

3. Insight: Through beneficial discussion and follow-up play, the child integrates the link between the story and their own life, with opportunities to practice how to address and solve issues of concern.

With these purposes in mind, the following nine steps will turn any children's book into affordable therapy.

Step 1) Identify the practical advice (the message) you want your child to know.

Step 2) Match the message with an appropriate book. Seek out junior fiction/non-fiction that deals with the particular issue (drugs, death, alcoholism, fear, bullying, protective behaviour, etc). While searching for the advice appropriate book, remember that:

The book should match your child's reading ability level,

The text must be at an interest level appropriate to the maturity of the youngster,

The theme of the book should match the identified needs,

The characters should be believable so that the child can identify with with the dilemma,

The plot of the story should be realistic and involve creativity in problem solving.

Step 3) Decide on the setting and time for the story reading. Will you read it with/to your child, will you leave the book for your child to find, will you suggest the book to your child as a great read and hope they ask you to buy it for them?

Step 4) Knowing that you need to be active for bibliotherapy to be effective, motivate your child to become involved with an associated problem solving follow up activity by making play suggestions prior to story end (e.g. "On the weekend we could have a Yell free day and instead mime out our angry feelings.")

Step 5) Based on your child’s reaction to your motivating suggestions, design one or more end-of-book-connected activities. This may be as simple as being available for discussion after story end, engaging with your child in drawing a picture from the story, or helping your child journal their thoughts on the book. More exciting: actively encourage dramatic play or drama around the learning issue, or visit a place connected to the story.

Step 6) Pre engage in the follow up activities by asking questions or having short discussions throughout the reading. At the end of a chapter or every few pages, sum up so that "the message" does not get lost in the fantasy.

Step 7) Straight after story end, take a break and allow your child to do their own reflection on the material.

Step 8) Introduce the follow-up activities by briefly retelling the story, focusing on how the characters solved their issue, and let the child know what you could both do to honor the advice/message in the book.

Step 9) Assist your child to integrate the advice gained by honestly answering any questions they may have.

Children’s story books, followed by a well thought out activity makes for cheap therapy: BIBLIOTHERAPY

A Protective Play Tutorial for Grandparents.

2006-11-19T19:03:00.000+10:00

Grandparent Sense, a Protective Play Tutorial, (funded by protective partner Cairns City Council) helps grandparents protect children in their care. Full of game and activity ideas, the tutorial booklets were free to Grandparents in the Cairns area. Filling a need, they went like hot cakes.

Protective Play is a term coined by Megan Bayliss (my mother) to describe everyday game ideas and activities to help keep kids safe. No requirement to buy expensive resources or spend scarce funds on protective behaviour trainings, the tutorials offer practical play advise and information about child sexual abuse.

An extract from Body Ownership in Grandparent Sense, a Protective Play Tutorial:

From the moment we are born, our bodies belong to us. They are our human signature. Babies may need to rely on adults to care for them but each baby’s body is still unique: unique skin, tone, imprints, hair, voice, size and shape.

A newborn baby has little realization of where their body begins and ends. As loving carers, we engage in touch, good touch, to teach our babies what is theirs and what is ours. We stroke them, massage them and put clothes on them to give a message of body ownership.

Children who are at risk of sexual abuse, or who have already been sexually assaulted often do not have a good idea of their body size or where their body boundaries begin and end. Too frequently, they fail to recognize their real size in relation to a potential perpetrator. Sometimes they think they are as big as the perpetrator and sometimes they see themselves as much smaller and helpless than everybody else in their family. This size confusion is a result of lowered self-esteem and something that perpetrators may focus on in their grooming process. For this reason, it is important to teach our grand children body ownership and to assist in ensuring they have a healthy self-esteem.

On the following page, there are some ideas you can play with to introduce and teach body ownership. It is not an exhaustive list, or in any order of importance, and you can redesign and change any of these to suit your grandchild’s personality and needs. Blend these suggestions into normal household activities and play. Make it natural and frequent: daily is best to help children remember that their body is their body.

Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast. Written by my Mum, Megan Bayliss.

2006-11-19T07:59:00.000+10:00

…there was a world sweeter than Marmalade.

Mum wrote this media release for her book launch in June 2006. The day was a blast. Around 100 people attended, the media too. Mum made the news that night.

CHILDREN’S BOOK LAUNCH

Caramel Marmalade: Made in Cairns.

The sweet smell of Cairns has been deliciously captured in a children’s chapter book written by Cairns author, mother of four, Megan Bayliss. The jam packed story jars against preserving the tartness of sour thinking and invites readers to sample a rare and safe sweetness found in the unlikely duo of Caramel and Marmalade.

With real Cairns flavour, the book conserves our freedom loving personality with the dunny humour typical of children in the north. The author has lived here for 30 years and her evocative mango and lime story is set in her own home street in Edge Hill.

Although written as a tall tell-tale and endearingly stirring children’s read, the book sensitively addresses important protective behaviour strategies aimed at protecting children from the harms hidden in our heavenly tropical paradise. The story gives children in the 8-12 year old age group an opportunity to growl against those seemingly sweet monsters that hide within our utopia but who may really want to change ripeness for life into a rancid, rotting mass of fly blown waste.

The book, Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast, will be launched in Cairns on Tuesday the 27th of June. The launch will be a family focused, FREE, dog/cat themed party with story reading, games, competitions and prizes for the whole family. Excepting the author, all launch officiators will be VIP guests: children.

This is a launch for the children, by the children. All families are welcome as long as the adults are well behaved. Dog and cat dress is encouraged. A signed copy of Bitss of Caramel Marmalade on Toast will be awarded to the best dressed family arriving as dogs or cats.

This is definitely a book to include in the discerning child’s or adult’s Christmas stocking. For an insatiable northern appetite, put away a signed copy from the launch. RRP $15.00.